Plan G (2023 Online Book)

Ch. 1 - GROUNDPLAN: GOD is great, first and foremost! This unapologetic five-chapter biopsy of memories is not about how knowledgeable I am in passing exams (Anyone can pass exams even those who are written off as daft, stupid and mentally challenged) nor how grit can make you invincible but how GOD got me through a violent turning point in my life: Kiboko for marks was the cruelest, most brutal, torturous, depressing, unwanted worst thing in my Ugandan school career; a very low point even worse than sickness, poverty (brokeness), unrequited love and bullying (Fear GOD, not fellow mortals who can also bleed!). It's not that I have a vendetta against teachers but strongly believe canes for marks should be outlawed in UG. Everyone is a sundial, but the sun shines on us at different angles. The mission of education should be to help learners find their position, not drag them into a shade or convenience shed. Freely allow every young'un to show his or her talent! Some people are not good at Mathematics, but might be perfect in Storytelling. Let them grow in that! The first person I hated in my life for real between age 1-5 was some grown Lugbara woman called Ana; she would mercilessly spank or beat us to sleep with tears. My own biological mother didn't even handle us that way; mama told me the woman was related from her Ayivu Clan (in Arua) but I did not care. Even my own father from Maracha Clan only beat me for stealing money from their drawers in the early 90s; that was more noble and acceptable. I actually respected him highly for seeing my pain and giving me five instead of 10 planned canes which I biblically deserved. Dad never whipped me again after that: I got to witness arrested criminals (including a Chotara neighbour's brother more than once) being walked by warders to Jinja Prison via our street almost every week at lunchtime and gave up money theft easily. Whenever Ana came home in the late 80s, I would stop whatever I was doing, run to my bed and pretend that I had been sleeping all along. When she left, I'd play and enjoy Jinja without any toxic daytime-sleep restrictions. Kids sleep when tired and exhausted, stress free; why force them? I forgive her though abhored her beatings. According to Wikipedia, school corporal punishment (use of physical force to cause deliberate bodily discomfort) is banned in 128 countries and only three economically developed countries allow it: United States, Singapore and Australia (technically legal in the state of Queensland alone). It was widely utilised in US schools during the 19th and 20th centuries as a rational way for educators (in the place of parents) to motivate students to perform better academically and maintain good behaviour parallel to the criminal justice system and Common Law doctrines. In 2023, physical punishment was still legal in the private schools of every state except New Jersey and Iowa; legal in public schools in 19 states but practised in only 15. Our nation's colonizers meanwhile prohibited it in all state-supported education around 1986, then extended to cover private schools in England and Wales (1998), Scotland (2000) and Northern Ireland (2003) but not Uganda. We were like slaves to grades and the teachers were slavedrivers; a personal revolution was needed. Primary 1 to 3 (Lower School) at Victoria Nile School (VNS) was relatively chill for me (Got Aggregate 4 in six out of nine terms) though competition was very very very high (Had 4 in P3 Second Term but was still the 22nd out of 80 pupils in my stream). Before I was born, my lovely mother Liza (shortened from Elizabeth) Ndezo Dramani (1947-2022) was a teacher from 1970 to 1980 and she used to beat me for "poor handwriting" in the early 90s. I couldn't hate her, but felt like running away from the Spire Road Custodian Board rental to become a homeless streetkid. Something told me to practise the fonts in novels and newspapers instead, but she still insisted that the letters were too small. It dawned on me that learning was a war. When I got to Upper School which starts from P4, the teachers started whipping us for weird reasons as if ignorance and time-constrained omission are crimes. Those who got fewer marks suffered the canes more because of passmarks but those with higher marks were not exempted: For instance one time I got 88 percent in Mathematics but was beaten in the first group for not answering a certain problem and leaving it blank; even Swengere (comedian) knows that silence is the best answer. Like Balaam's donkey (Numbers 22), I had the right to ask: What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times? However, I didn't. Others were beaten for failing questions that had been taught recently or passed by the majority of pupils, correct method but wrong answer, etc. This annoyed me very much but I couldn't stop the teachers, neither throw a chair at them like Cristiano Ronaldo at 14 years old nor beat them up in their dreams like Erica Mukisa (a former witch and VNS Old Girl) did. The cute Miss Ganda was my favourite teacher because she never beat us like other staff members; even praised me for the way I drew a skeleton in my Science classwork book. In P5, the flogging continued and I was still helpless in my worst year during Primary in terms of average marks (Lowest was 60 percent in First Term with Aggregate 13). With all the American-donated books I read from the library which I helped our English Classteacher organise in their catalogues, I was just confused with data and confident for nothing. This mixed up ChatGPT-esque experience later helped me select specifically what to internalise; I had to read to pass tests, not just gain unlimited general knowledge. Some of my answers seemed very impressive but I was dead wrong writing plausible-sounding nonsense, deviating from facts and fabricating reality through hallucinations. Even in Senior 6, I wrote 7 pages of verbose answers in a Literature Novels test but my Best Buddy called Ikinyang (an Itesot) rounded us with only one page; there was a gap of two lines between his concise answers. P5 was amazing nonetheless because I got to witness a P6 girl promoted to P7 on merit in the course of the year; lucky her! She was too good for her level. Meanwhile, there was a legend of a beautiful Indian streammate who performed last in our First Term, disappeared to I don't know where in Second Term, then returned to round up all of us during Third Term (Behind her, I was 7th out of 84 with Aggregate 6); chickiddie was totally unreal like the Twenty22 Golden State Warriors! Those two Jinja Girls inspired me somehow. I used to play a lot in the first two terms of the year, then settle to read strategically for promotion during the final term: I made sure I didn't repeat a single class. One of the teachers (Mr. Bamwamye) in P6 was so ferocious in his punishments that when I met him again on Buganda Road after a very long time (over a dozen years later), my head quickly imagined that he had taped a long stick on his backspine (but inside the shirt) and would pull it out like John McClane's pistol in Diehard (1988 film). I was ready to scream: Yipikaye bloodsucker! and bolt away from him. However, he stretched out his hand to greet and could even remember me; that was a huge relief. The memory of trauma never dissipates completely. Many people who lived in Jinja after Obote 2's regime probably heard about Mr. Gawaya - the biological father of lawyer Gawaya Tegulle; he was VNS headmaster for 22 years. The man could whip pupils very hard during General Assembly though for legit disciplinary reasons like theft, stubbornness, disobedience, latecoming, violating dresscodes, vandalism, home issues with parents or guardians, etc. Alternate disciplinary measures could have been suspension, digging in the gardens, cleaning toilets, community work, etc. Gawaya's name alone spelt terror as if he used "wires" for flogging but the sticks were just as scorching. Luckily for me, I never got into any fracas with him until my final term at VNS. My dad had written a letter saying me and my sibling Rachel would leave the school, so there was no need to buy a tie for me; Gawaya's deputy Mr. Okoth Ocen nevertheless whipped me at lunchbreak during my 12 X-pain-injection guineaworm phase because of no tie as if he never knew it was my final term. One fateful afternoon, I got back to school after walking through a different street corridor from the usual one and argued with my classmates whether the animal statue at a certain Main Street grocery shop was a giraffe or another animal. Our argument was very loud but then suddenly the room became dead quiet and everybody sat down on their chairs. Noone even warned me in time but just left me to dry as the scapegoat for the entire class. I was sitted on top of my desk near the back facing backwards and when I turned to see why everyone was mute, Mr. Gawaya whose office was near our stream stood at the doorway. He didn't have to gesture for me to come to him; I humbly went as if by magnetism expecting him to either slap me or be lenient and only give a verbal warning since I had never crisscrossed his path in six years. His kiboko was my biggest fear. Fortunately or unluckily, whichever way you look at it, the big man grabbed my elbow and slapped my arm, then pinched it, slapped it again, pinched again until he decided it was enough. It was really painful but better than a cheek slap or bum lash and from that day till I left Jinja a few weeks later, I kept watch vigilantly. Mr. Gawaya only taught P7, so I was going to escape the canes he struck on candidates some evenings. While we played after all classes had ended and beyond the final twilight bell, we would hear whips and cries in the P7 classrooms. I was happy that I was going to survive all of that. What I didn't know was that the school I was being taken to had Capital (City) punishment. I joined Kalinabiri Primary School (KPS) on Kalinabiri Road off Kiwatule Highway, UEB Zone, Ntinda in P6 Second Term and it was relatively peaceful. All my Jinja dreams of getting magical powers (African Science) from a Lake Victoria island I heard about before the horizon evaporated because I lost proximity. I didn't know it was devilish yet; even thought Lucifer was the name of GOD's Most Beautiful Angel until my sister Doris found me calling his name thrice infront of a switched-off black and white TV set in Kyebando Kisalosalo (somewhere between 1995-7) so that he could "come to me". She taught me it was the other name for Satan and I spotted instant goosepimples on my arms: Ignorance is bad! Barbra Anyait who sat on my left helped me feel comfortable about my new school because we conversed like we had known each other from a past life. However, when I chatted with my P7 dormmates (especially the Headboy Joseph Oluka whose mantle transferred to me the next year), they warned me about a regular Firing Squad where candidate pupils are beaten for poor grades or deterioration. Having seen enough corporal punishment in Jinja already, I swore never to fall victim to any academic strokes (Only Mr. Kiwanuka from P7 West whipped our entire East stream for making noise after lunch one unfortunate afternoon before our lesson teacher came; I was not exonerated since I didn't shush my streammates. I used to warn them that Joseph Kony would chop out their tongues if they didn't keep quiet; Mr. K just whipped me anyway after my legendary status of being unwhippable when it came to testmarks). It's funny how I was never whipped for academics by any of the teachers with the Most Feared Kiboko (Mr. Isabirye P4; muscular P4 Science teacher at KPS; the tall, darkskinned Mr. Okutela [sounds like Nutella groundnut paste] P5 SST; Mr. Okoth Ocen; Mr. Gawaya [Scariest]; Mr. Katongole aka Kutos [the big Lower School Deputy Headmaster whom I joked, chatted and laughed with more than got into any problem with]; Mr. Busuulwa - Advanced Level Hostel Warden who made me kneel for wearing sandals instead of shoes to class plus confiscated my radio from my deskmate Nicholas Jjengo just before UACE ended; etc) but still suffered between P4 and 6. I designed a sustainable masterplan to jump Firing Squad canes as my favourite sportsman Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls churned out their 72-10 record-setting season; I was on my Unbeaten Run. Before Kalinabiri, the only time I had registered 1st place on my reportcard was during P1 Third term (Average 97 percent) where I tied with my Best Friend Denis Ogwapit (an Itesot) and Anthony Ntaki (from the Garden Tea family) but had been 3rd in the preceding term. If you want peace, prepare for war [Latin: Si vis pacem, para bellum]! There were no other options. I had to remain dead-focussed like John Wick, aim for Top Spot once again and stay there or wallow in monthly body pain. I decided to pray to GOD every night for help and HE made sure I was the only 96er who wasn't whipped for academic reasons. I used to feel bad when Elizabeth in West with a rare disease that made her "fragile" was subjected to canes too. Streammate Agnes looked like the sibling I follow and tears would almost form when she was beaten; I would ask myself why I couldn't discuss with her how to jump Firing Squad. After KPS, I never returned to Number 1 spot in my reportcards again since there were no more academic whips, used relaxed natural intelligence aka nachura (UCE: 9 on 6 and 15 on 8; UACE: 18 points out of 25; BA: 4.12 GPA out of 5). Why stress myself? Progress in life is not only exam marks, maybe Deutsche Marks or D-Marks. Why can't passing in class translate to making money? That's one of the queries that made me step back a bit from the pursuit of a Masters or PhD; I need to apply whatever I've read instead of just accumulating certificates. You can have multiple 1st Class university degrees and still be more redundant than a Senior 2 dropout. In fact, even the Art I do as a profession and self-employment has a background of a constant annual 7 percent classwork deterioration since Senior 1 until I dropped it in S5 to teach myself through practice how to finish gigs. I was rejected from joining the Technical Drawing class causing tears in my eyes, but swore to learn and earn my own GOD-ordained way. Maybe in future, machines will even outperform us without degrees. I'd rather spend money on assets since I already have a foundation in education and learn more at work. When I returned to visit my old school, I was told that PLE performances dropped after our 1996 lot left; other yearmates confirmed what I heard. Parents oftentimes beat their kids for low grades yet some people's GOD-given expertise is not examined. On my final full Friday as a resident of Jinja, my Best Friend came to take me to enjoy the afternoon with a former streammate of ours named Abed Abud who stayed around Lubas Road; he had been moved to the third stream of performers after P5 but we didn't care and I used to stay alert to hear his name since mine followed in 2nd place during roll calls. Friendship is not based on exam marks. His mother - whom I always respected and usually spotted when she drove her kids to school - asked us how we performed and our responses (7th and 11th) literally changed the atmosphere; Abed was beaten with a belt for being 20th in his stream and I felt his pain because my own mother used to beat me for "poor handwriting" three years behind. His punishment didn't change my opinion of him at all: Big, but very kind and loaded Muslim just like Ghulam Wakabi who campus hostelmate Joseph Katimbo later told me was half Musoga. We spent the sunset riding Abed's mountain bike in turns on Oboja Road near Ogwapit's crib. I'll never forget Abed for one moment in P5 when our English Classteacher asked him to entertain the class during a short break while other classmates held a debate in the main hall. Alongside Muyangu, another Muslim, he performed "Number One" by Apache Indian and requested me to dance around them: I made up a "front slide" dance because moving backwards was on my blind side. The audience applauded us and I felt high. GOD is great...

Ch. 2 - GOALS: What is your goal or target? What do you want to achieve in your life? When I was young, I wanted to grow up into a Footballer. In P3, the Religious Education (RE) teacher asked us to draw the person we wanted to become when older and I drew a footballer. I was born in 1984 at a time when Michel Platini and Maradona ruled the world, but they were not my fancy. The first footballer I idolised was Liverpool's John Barnes around the late 80s. I'd kick small forest green oranges for practice or my cousin Dramu's tango football while imitating what I saw on TV. In the early 90s, I supported Germany, Bayern Munich, Denmark, Nigeria, Brazil, Nile FC plus Express (Mukwano Gwa Banji) and got to see more players like Lothar Mathaeus (Bayern Munich), David Ginola (Tottenham), Tony Yeboah (Eintracht Frankfurt), Ian Wright (Arsenal), Eric Cantona (Manchester United), etc. Majid Musisi, Paul Hasule, Sadiq Wassa, etc held the flag for UG. However, Brazilian striker Romario was my ultimate benchmark: sluggish and seemingly harmless in the buildup play but then suddenly bursts into speed when it matters most; deceptive like Messi (when he walks around doing seemingly nothing as Louis Van Gaal said)! VNS classmates during P4 told me I played like a man, represented my P5 class in the inter-stream contest though lost 2-0 while villagemates in the Spire Road neighbourhood named me Captain. My mother always told me I was famous in the hood for football. I knew how to make local balls using papers, rubber tyre straps, polythene bags, milk sackets, banana fibres, straws, etc. At KPS, I was called to join the school team by streammate Tom Lumu (from whom I learnt the Zidane turn) plus others. However, because of the time I would spend training or playing for the school, I realised it would mess up my reading schedule, so I gave up my football dreams. They literally collapsed and died, buried six feet under. Like Milton Hershey (who created The Sweetest Place On Earth) and LeBron James, I knew I had to accept failure, but succeed elsewhere. I can only remember running laps for my Norwegian House on Sports Day plus weekend soccer in P6 but other than that, I focussed on skipping canes more than sports in P7. At SMACK, I played Survival Football in midfield copying Patrick Vieira (The Wildman at Highbury) just for fun scoring a few goals. In one Block Owners (BO) Liga final, my team led by Captain Craig Lugemwa lost 4-2 (Both our goals were equalisers); I transferred to Zagallo's winning team the next season but our money-fueled arrangements were stopped by the school administration. I didn't think my childhood professional football dreams could be resurrected though, kept my head buried in books and sought a new future. Other dreamjobs I thought of in Jinja included Doctor like many of my classfriends and Trucker so that I could go anywhere plus meet as many women as I desired, but the speculations also vanished. Even in Senior 1 at SMACK, I was still undecided about what I wanted to be in future; Fireman was another option I weighed but it fizzled out before the flame engulfed me. Slowly but steadily, I started digging out my Fine Art diamond without any whips thanks to SMACK and Macos teachers plus schoolmates. After KPS, I was only whipped for alleged cheating in a test with my deskmate by the Maths teacher, leaving the quadrangle late in S4 by the Headmaster (after serving as Timekeeper the preceding year: Left marks on my behind that cold morning) and economisingly writing very small, tiny letters (Two lines within a ruled space meant for one line) in my Senior 6 Economics classwork book (In fact, the beautiful brownskinned teacher literally just placed the stick softly on my bums twice; still adored her though after that staffroom punishment). I'm a quiet backbencher, not because attention makes me shy but because am not greedy for it; I pick my moments. I'm comfortable being expendable (It's okay if am not the life of the party), playing behind the main striker like Leandro Trossard does or fighting my lifewars like a very silent, supercalm sniper (Suffer patiently!). Boarding school was a totally new experience to me in P6; I actually reasoned that my parents were probably getting rid of me for my stubborness in Jinja. That stopped tears from forming as I embraced my punishment away from them and served my time. Ntinda flu was scary! One of my goals was to finish that chapter and move elsewhere. Ntinda flu could not allow me to laugh because when I laughed, the sound of a rocket could be heard in class from my mouth. So, vigilance was key. These unusual Ntinda rocket coughs pierced the chest painfully. I'm grateful that this cruel strain ended for me in Ntinda though a very exciting girl once coughed a rocket on campus and I wondered if it caused pain in her chest. Eating oily doughnuts at SMACK brought rockets but they were not painful in the chest. There was also a rare face rash that affected cross-country runners who passed through a certain forest area in Ntinda. It didn't afflict me though; GOD is great...

Ch. 3 - GRIT & GRIND LIKE GOOGLE BARD AI: The year 1996 started a bit badly coz I scored Aggregate 8 at the end of the term though I remember getting 10 out of 10 in a weekend Maths test after revising hard on reaching home at the end of P6 Third Term (1995): Mr. Mukasa called me to the front for a hug that sunny Saturday and it felt like vindication for scoring 62 percent in Maths (Failure made me focus) while the other three subjects were all above 90 percent (Got Aggregate 7 meaning I had 4 in Maths alone) on my P6 Term III reportcard which also certified me as Number 1 for the first time since the end of 1990. In my pioneer term which was the 2nd of the year, I was the 6th out of 85 pupils; average age was 12 years 6 months yet I was only 11 years 8 months old and felt helplessly challenged in my new boarding school. I was the only person with Aggregate 5 while the Top 5 all got 4s while the next person was also alone with 6; Mathematics was my worst subject with 62 percent yet I was the best in English at 90 percent and Science (tied with Lubowa the overall winner at 83), 3rd with Torach in SST at 88 (Buyinza who was 26th in position amazingly topped here with 91). If total marks were considered for position, then I would have been Number 3 after Wazarwahi in Term II. Secondly, the fear of the imminent monthly Firing Squad program later in the year was still brewing and even compounded further when a New Vision Newspaper frontpage headline reported how a schoolgoer was caned to death by a teacher. I was amazed when I got Aggregate 4 in 2nd Term Mocks (both internal and external); it reassured me that my goal to jump canes during the final lap was not a white elephant and I never regressed again but worked like a well-oiled machine. For every question I failed, I admitted my ignorance but would write the correct answer in a different colour above the blunder so that next time am spot on because I revisited those papers. Grit is courageous super-commitment, unflinching determination, concentrated mental toughness, no-messing-around attitude, consistent plus calculative stay scheming discipline and lasersharp focus; it's spiritual, but grind is physical. Like David to the Philistine Goliath in 1st Samuel 17:45, I looked at the punishment system and said, "You come against me with marking guide and cane and whip, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the GOD of the armies of Israel." I was Old Testament in aggressiveness; I used my pain from Idhindha (Busoga) to gain academic concentration with icecold nerves until I left Ntinda (It started waning after I scored 40 out of 40 in a Senior 1 History test). I had made up my mind to be Top of the P7 Class in academics and worked very hard towards it; no excuses. My strategy was about reading all the test papers with answers I carried from Jinja (Most belonged to my elder sisters who all finished P7 at VNS) and elsewhere including Kalinabiri plus UNEB Primary Leaving Examinations (PLE) past papers from many bygone years (Got a maroon-covered B5-size book from Levi Buyinza). I also read a big yellow Standard 8 book used in Kenyan schools (that was like P8 which we did not have in Uganda), Introduction to Biology which I sniffed as a ritual in order to inhale all the knowledge printed plus a complex Chemistry textbook; the last two books were used in secondary schools as I later found out. Ignorance is darkness; I optimised every academic resource around me but avoided fiction like novels because only facts were examined. Otyek told me in Twenty23 that I supplied answers in P7; I even had my own  secret, personal Word Interchange Theory (WIT): All exam answers are words we already know, what we have to do is string them together in perfect order like a puzzle or maze. My computational guesswork reasoning was hopefully operating at 90 percent efficiency almost like Google Search or Bard AI (LaMDA) and Gemini without apology. Even though I tried to do well, I never won any bursaries for a long time; SMACK sold me away after getting 15 within the 17 points passmark in S4 which was increased to 14 and cut me out. With my 18 points in S6, I failed to get Government sponsorship, so when I joined UCU, I revised in 1st Semester like my life depended on it (Even prayed harder) until GOD finally granted me a partial bursary. GOD is great...

Ch. 4 - GRAVITY: The force that causes something to fall to the ground or to be attracted to another planet is called gravity. Although my marks were high and people praised me, I tried to remain very down to earth and humble; I was basically well-grounded like a green and yellow earth wire though my mind was a livewire. I wasn't selfish nor mean with my answers because I wasn't competing with anybody. In my head, all I wanted was to jump kiboko (child abuse/ classroom violence). Some people still hated me for being "proud" apparently, but the wellwishers I treasured. The thorn in my flesh was that I wetted my bed without self control on some nights and that kept me cool-headed; my prayers to stop took time to reduce my curse in later years: I would suggest that anyone with a bedwetting problem must put a waterproof macintosh-like material on their mattress. One Bantu classmate still playfully or maybe disrespectfully addressed me as Odre [Lugbara for: Urine] but I forgave him. I once heard some dudes say that I was going to be reported to the Headgirl for not bathing though I did bathe every morning because of my bedwetting situation; evening was a little bit optional in my calculation but I did clean up many times at sunset also. Ntinda (which had the UNEB headquarters, Ministers Village, etc) was a very upbeat suburb compared to Bukoto plus my beloved, more peaceful Kyebando where I resided during holidays. What baffled me in Ntinda though was owners of bufunda [small hotels] keeping food hot in saucepans by covering with polythene material instead of banana leaves and 11-year old prostitutes. Security was not too bad. I cannot deny the fact that my schoolmates encouraged me to keep on meticulously grinding out results. I didn't step on toes intentionally nor intimidate people with my position, but respected everyone because we are all GOD's children and gifted differently (Matthew 25:14-30). I cherish all my over 172 comrades in the struggle even if we might have had many differences. One time I fought with Brian Denis Samula in the dormitory during the early morning and reported him to the teachers. He was expelled from the dorm by administration before lunch the same day; I felt very bad about how I had used my power as the Headboy because I thought by reporting him, he would be whipped or given a task to do. After campus, I apologised diplomatically for everything that befell him because of me; no bad blood nor beef between us! I would visit Alex Lubega in Ntinda after uni, very ingenious footballer and technician, helped repair my laptops. I met James Wanyira on Ntinda - Kisaasi Road after campus; we both loved cabbages. One evening while attending overnight at Watoto Church North with my sister Doris and her beautiful, happy-chatty Lugbara friend named Jennifer (Chandia's woman who made me gain extra recognition from people in Kyebando and Kamwokya on the day of my graduation party by letting me carry her newborn like its father while in my UCU gown), Wanyira preached. It inspired me to also give a testimony about the hospital discharge of a friend's uncle and thanked GOD for reuniting me and my OB after almost 10 years. Richard Mukalazi made a helicopter that could move with two passengers on board; it was parked on the verandah outside our class. Whenever Joshua Buyinza who used to make comedy by wearing extrateeth found me on the streets of Kampala, it felt divine because GOD made us yearmmates for a reason (HE could have sent me to any other nearby suburb school); I liked JB's poise. Lazarus Wazarwahi (though deceased) encouraged me to read harder because he was a natural bwat and became Class Monitor after GOD upgraded me; we studied O-Level at SMACK plus played football together and was shattered when I heard that he had left the earth. Denis Lubowa was immovable academically plus posed a great challenge and somehow pushed me to get better and better in my grades. Fred Kegere was a very good friend (made me wonder why I like Itesots as my Best Friends); Geoffrey Bwire too. Geofrey Kilama gifted me a pair of shorts; told him I would always remember that. Denis Olupot the Gost was a lively guy, conspicuous in a crowd. Wilkins G. Kaweesi was a firebrand. Gerald Kitongo was nicknamed Itongwa the rebel. Solomon Nsubuga was a baller; Denis L. Kavuma as well. Phillip Mangeni (authentic dude who departed in 2024) was an unforgettable fixture too. Nicholas Byuma and John Patrick Adar (Index Number 25/010/001, I was next) had character. Michael Sempijja was yellow in aura. Charles Wanzunula was comedy personified; their home shared a fence with the school but he was in boarding instead of dayschool, hahaha! Dormmates would ask the nurse for "busidi [seeds, groundnuts, grab, etc]". Ronnie Otyek from the West Stream was a great buddy along with Denis (John) Oboi plus Johnson Byiringiro; we met again at UCU Mukono but studied different courses. OJD or DJO depending on how you want to arrange his initials was usually with lefthanded Robert Kiwanuka plus Ibrahim Olanya. Alison Tumwebaze, aka Auf was a conversationalist who I regarded as one of the Best Two Debaters alongside his daredevil sidekick Wango. Moses Nuwagaba was a brother from another mother; used to see him at their shop in Bukoto on Kisaasi Road. Collins Kasirye who became a doctor was urban, always with a gang of buddies. Mukiibi in The Mindset Show by Lifeline Filmz was also known as Bright. Pius Lukwago was quite tall and stayed very near the school; our non-optional holiday coaching was not very far from their home. Some dude got a devilishly weird skin disease and when he returned home to recover, I mysteriously found myself kneeling on his mid-decker bed one zombified night trying to force my way out through the dorm wall. It's like I sleepwalked from my own mid-decker bed next to his, but thank GOD I didn't catch his genital warts. There were stories of kalabanda [shortman spirits] in Ugandan schools but one day while sick, I stayed behind alone in the dorm to see one and waited in vain. Some dudes would disgustingly clean their flusick nostrils using the towel covering my bed but I couldn't arrest any. Alfred Segane (painter) lived on the other side of the shower space and would get for us mangoes. There was a graveyard nearby and we would see strange bonfires late in the night. Musinguzi was tough like flu but unfortunately we lost him during 7/11 (the World Cup bombing on 11th July 2010) at Kyadondo Grounds. Among the ladies, 1996 was definitely Index Number 084 Dorothy Amuron's year in my life - no arguments about that; yearmates thought the future lawyer was my girlfriend because of how we freely talked to each other. If she was the Earth, then I was the moon or Mars; we shared the same sunshine. She thought I was adorable even if I had principles to follow. Doro made the commandment "Love your neighbour as you love yourself" seem real to me; she was a very loving deskmate. Whenever a passenger balloon would fly above Kampala, I would remember Wizard of Oz fairytales that featured her namesake. Doro (half Itesot, half Indian) sat next to me, so what would anyone expect? I had to be mesmerised by her unforced, goodhearted attractiveness; she shared her breakbites with me plus some secrets, asked questions, discussed academics, lent her interesting textbooks, praised me, told me stories about her family, washed my youngest sister's clothes and sometimes wore my school sweater; our neighbourliness felt that platonic. Some people even thought we were meant to be together: I was somebody Doro could talk to and she showed that she cared about me; I couldn't distance myself. Memories of her glorious kindness made me love her more than just a crush nor puppy love. Sometime before Third Term, she lent me a special textbook for the holidays (Who does that other than somebody who trusts you?) and it introduced to me how newspapers are made. I used to think newspapers were prophetic reporting exactly what was going to happen that day (Evening editions seem to do that though not really); had no clue how they were prepared a day before. The only alteration was the forward date. I had a memorable time around Doro in the 3rd row of the first column with four desks near the entrance. Beside every successful boy, there is a girl. She loved music and I always wanted her to sit on my right side instead of left. Nevertheless, I never told her goodbye after PLE because I believed I would meet her again: If she loved me, then I would love her back; that was my equation. She could see I liked her but I did not say it: Actions speak louder than words. Doro gave me strength and I respected her for that. After hearing about her looking for me (and finally reconnecting on phone) seven years later, I wrote in my journal how "good hearted" she was towards me in '96. "I don't know why she liked me but it really showed... made my dormitory classmates tease me that she was my GIRLFRIEND, a statement I denied... She was kind and relaxed... She always gave me the fuel to be the Best... Unconsciously I think I never wanted her to leave my side... My Dolot-hea..." When she disclosed in 2003 that she had a boyfriend, one wall in my freshman heart cracked (Couldn't compete with the other man, not even civilly) but I forced my skeleton to find her in the Makerere Kikoni area at the end of my 4th semester (2nd Year in UCU Mukono) and thank her for the past as I looked for internship opportunities in 2005 like a Slumdog Millionaire. Truth be told, my return to Kyaggwe after a three month vacation witnessed my personal best semester ever out of six (Scored 4.33 Grade Point Average out of 5; transcripts do not lie). There was something unexplainably divine about Doro that always elevated me like an unstoppable train. I even drew her portrait and stringed it next to the one for my new 2005 "Galfi" on the wall of my third hostelroom for nostalgic motivation even though I failed to get 1st Class nor 1st place at graduation. As the years passed, she reminded me how I was "always Number 1 in class" and that I showed everyone how to read. Her impact on my life was not a one-off fluke evidenced by the fact that her two sons Daniel and Darrel both got 4 in PLE also plus went to SMACK, just like me. Maureen Apio sat in the row ahead of me and had a good report; she was goodlooking too. Heard she is related to Otyek who is also a relative to Cecilia Ogwal, the veteran stateswoman from Lango. We met again at UCU doing separate courses though but I would talk to Mo via UTL for two hours without getting bored even for one second. Mo struck the right chords in my heart like a diva. She thought I'd grow up to be a shrink similar to Dr. House. Sometimes, I'd ask her about certain things I wanted to ascertain. She requested me to be the godfather of her first child, but am quite irresponsible. Nevertheless, I picked one rainy evening in 2007 to see my "Goddota" while her mother was a warden of Africa Hall at Makerere University. After waiting in vain from 7 to 11pm (though met some OBs passing by), I decided that I had to return home. Midnight found me still in the city and I was arrested by an all-green-uniformed watchman at Shell Ben Kiwanuka Street for standing behind a loaded Fuso truck heading to Zambia like a thief apparently. With a bayonet rifle in his left hand, he tried slapping me several times with his right while I guarded with my left arm; got bruises on my elbow and left neck. He threatened to lock me up inside the generator room for his more brutal boss to deal with me in the morning. Furious, I sat on the oil pump base barechested and prayed a Muslim dua: GOD help me, GOD help me, GOD help me! Suddenly, another watchman clad in all-navy blue and holding a rifle came from around the corner. He calmly asked for my ID Card which the hyper guard had confiscated, went near a lightbulb and returned to say authoritatively: Let him go! I think I heard an angel in disguise speak; I put back on my Ghanaian shirt and spent the rest of the night roaming around the streets before heading home after sunrise to recover. Meanwhile, Urban TV's Emma Bongomin who has a very active memory would address me online as "Headboy" or "OB" and remind me that I cannot run from the past; am stuck forever in this history building. One of my favourite quotes by EB is: Why can't passing in class translate to making money? That's classic! Marion Nakyeyune was (Headmaster) Mr. Danze's daughter and a stunningly beautiful brainiac who became a qualified surgeon. I did not sit near her except 1st Term when I was Class Monitor but respected her from afar; she was out of my league. One day, she brought me a test paper to fill with answers and I smiled like it was just a lucid dream; the last girl I had a crush on at VNS around 1993-5 (Mariam Were) and Rita whom I fancied in our Kyebando Kisalosalo hood after P7 had the same beauty class as Marion, you know, Halle Berry Miss USA 1986 things. I calmly wrote down what I knew and handed the paper back to the beauty. Lucy Angom knew the hottest reggae lyrics. Hadijah Namutebi had my respect as one of the elders in our stream. Diana Namugalu (The Headgirl) was more popular than I was and deserved her honourable position more than I did mine after spending her entire primary school career at KPS (Those are about 21 school terms; for me I had only three when elections came and finished with five in total. Even her streammate Joseph Asea got more votes than me; he should have been Headboy). She was the glorious Queen of the West like Kampala Creme while I eulogised myself as the Beast King of the East, not a shambaboy. Her wealth of knowledge about the school was something I could lean on and she was bright too. One time, someone told me that she had scored 100 percent in a test. I checked my own paper and discovered that three numbers had been crossed wrong yet they were right. So I went back to the teacher and he also awarded me 100 percent. Beyond KPS, I met Lady Dee again at Makerere University Kampala in the first weekend after my last 2006 UCU exam before graduation (those were 10 years without seeing her); an OB told me she was around for the Pricewaterhouse Coopers interview we had all come for and the reunion was extremely refreshing. Comfort Apoo (aka Grace) who lived in Bukoto had composure beyond her age; just like Pauline Nahamya. Elizabeth Edna Nakimera was another spark from the West stream. Josephine Torach was a giant. Keserina [Catherine] Kembabazi had the admirable aura of an intellectual; reminded me of the sibling I follow just like Agnes. Elizabeth Ampire on my right kept me sensible. Docus Nabitaka who also sat in my row and column was a beautiful, brown-skinned painting plus mature woman (only teachers could vibe her); at age 12, I had to calm down and act grown around her with my grey coat plus blue trousers that no other male student wore. Her pristine, Chotara-istic closefriend who ironed her school uniforms with razorsharp finesse once hit my head with her ngolo [bare knuckles] in P6. I had refused to draw for her during a busy Art lesson by Miss Agnes Kibone (after sketching for other streammates and eating away the time to finish my own assignment), then somebody threw a banana fibre ball at her from across the room; it rolled under my desk. When I went down-under to pick it, I returned with her frame waiting for me like a tower, then: Baaammm! She hit me but I did not retaliate; just gave her a "Don't do that again, beautiful girl" pass. I even wanted to help her, but retracted to calm the awkward situation since I was a newcomer. As her HB, she was kinder and more respectful towards me than on that nasty afternoon, so I didn't hold the past against her, even if I had the power to punish her. 

Everyone else in the Class of '96 influenced me in their own special way even if not mentioned; I call them the Kalinabiri 96ers (franchise team). Forgive me if I omit somebody but am going to try and list all my other yearmates, beginning with the males: Angura Israel, Apiku Anthony, Baisi David, Bulega David, Bwiko David, Eron Tom, Gabula M. Benard, Iraua Daniel, Jera Julius, Kajoba Emmanuel, Kajobe E. Kalemera, Kakooza Michael, Kavuma L. Denis, Kermu Richard, Kibira Hercules, Kinene Barrlet, Kiwanuka S. Kasozi, Kahumuza K. Raymond, Kutosi Kenneth, Kyobe Simon, Lugayizi Francis, Lule M. Israel, Mayanja Rashid Bobic, Mpagi Ivan, Mudumi Michael, Mugere Andrew, Mugisha Godfrey, Mutebi Andrew, Ntensibe Michael, Ochan L. Gordon, Ojambo Alex, Olanya Ibrahim, Ongodia Andrew, Onyango Denis, Rwomubanyoro Adolf, Sabavuma Frank, Sendegeya Isaac, Ssebidandi Martin, Semasaze Joshua, 062 Frederick, Ssenkubuge Stanley, Sentamu Joseph, Senyonga Nicholas, Sewankambo Jude, Tambo Arthur, Walakira Isaac, Wanyonyi Patrick, Waboth Christopher, Wangwo Samuel, Wasswa Simon... 

Females: Ajuo Emma, Ajilong Betty, Akello Agnes, Akello Janet, Akol Shadia, Amuron Rebecca, Angom Lucy, Anuro Monica, Apolot Scovia, Atuheire Alicia, Auma Josephine, Bassoga Assa, Hasasha Violet, Kakwenzi Marisa, Kalungi Irene, Kamugisha Diana, Kasande Joyce, Katushabe Monica, Katusiime Grace, Kawoozo Doreen, Kayaga Evelyn, Kemigisha Eva, Kisakye Alice, Kobusingye Suzan, Ladur A. Norah, Makumbi Teddy, Mayende Lorna, Mirembe Stella, Mukisa Gloria, Musanyula Lillian, Mutesi Angel, Mutinye Florence, Mutonyi Caroline, Nabakooza Sarah, Nabanoba Faridah, Nabatanzi Lillian, Nabatte Juliet, Nabaweesi Sylivia, Nabirye Joan, Nabuchu Damali, Nabukalu Sanira, Nabukeera Nusula, Nabukeera Zaina, Nabunya Yudeya, Nabwire Jacquline, Naigwe Yuvet, Nakafeero Faridah, Nakajumba Sheila, Nakanwagi Stella, Nakimera Margret, Nakiray Fatuma, Naluyange Rose, Namono Sylivia, Namusuza Josephine, Nankabirwa Teddy, Nanteza Gwen, Nanziri Ruth, Nasolo Edith, Onyuta Hellen, Pacuto Suzan...

The other schoolmates in lower classes had an impact too: The fairly tall, fleshy, lightskinned Assistant Headgirl Catherine Nazziwa informed me she would bathe five times a day yet I did it once or twice daily; maybe as a Muslim can do. Among the boys, Clement Atibuni who found me playing soccer on Mt. Wati Road in Arua told me Miss Kibone would assure them how I write "like a computer". Andrew Cara didn't forget my crispy drawing of The Terminator; etc. GOD is great...

Ch. 5 - GOD: Last but most important, I highlight the Alpha and Omega; the main reason I wrote this short book after 27 years away from my P7 desk. There is noone else higher nor more powerful than the Almighty up in Heaven whose feet rest on the Earth! HE is the owner of power: Hosanna, hallelujah! Worship GOD! In Romans 14:11 as well as Isaiah 45:23, it is written: "As surely as I live," says the LORD, "Every knee will bow before me; every tongue will acknowledge GOD." Forgive us our sins, FATHER! I attribute my immaculate academic performances and Escape from Sobs to GOD because I prayed to HIM every night to make me the Best Academician in my class. I was a GOD-made brainiac; not because of White Star Magic soap nor Gatorade nor Sprite but daily night Prayer before sleep. As a bonus, he also made me the Headboy because teachers saw through my unflinching hustle as a noble sign of leadership (All authority comes from GOD as Romans 13:1-7 informs us). GOD deposes kings and raises up others (Daniel 2:21); HE made the proud, idol-worshipping King Nebuchadnezzar to live away from people and eat grass like the ox (Daniel 4:28-37) until he acknowledged that the Most High is sovereign over all the kingdoms on earth and gives them to anyone HE wishes. In Matthew 4:8-10, the Devil lied to JESUS that he would give HIM all the kingdoms of the world and their splendour if HE would bow down and worship him, but JESUS quoted Deuteronomy 6:13 and he left. Faithful Prayer is not a waste of time; it can move mountains and throw them into the ocean or blast them up to smithereens like dynamite. In Twenty17, the KCPE Results were topped by a 14 year old Albino girl named Goldalyn Kakuya Tanga. When asked by Kenyan Press what her secret was, she mentioned Prayer in first place, then Hardwork and Discipline: GOD answers prayers. Ask and you will receive; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened (Matthew 7:7)! Daniel waited 21 days (three weeks) for a response from GOD (Daniel 10:12-13) but you can receive your answers faster than that. Andrew Wommack taught me: Your faith is a bridge between the spiritual realm and physical manifestation. Meanwhile, Elvis Mbonye (Prophet to the Nations) said: When you want something, go for GOD's grace; it will bring you what you want. Grace gives you more than you deserve. With my back against the wall, GOD helped me morph out into beast mode; no staying down. I was secretly trying to sidestep canes and had no desire whatsoever to become a prefect but teachers still applauded my test results reverently: Mr. Mukasa labelled me the Most Handsome like I was a Very Important Pupil (V.I.P.) while Mr. Magumba called me his "son"; Levi's dad was very steady (Met him again at UCU). I treasured Mr. Kintu's lesson about how to organise adjectives; the formula was truly amazing! Mr. Tinka also had his funny vibes (Do you know a cow? Hahaha!). The Political Science muzeyi had many stories; he wasn't involved in caning us though. We didn't have any female teachers in P7, so the canes were really energetic and full. The educators even told my parents that if I didn't score 4 points on 4 subjects during PLE, they would take all my monthly results to Uganda National Examinations Board (UNEB) nearby in Ntinda to give me a honorary 4 aggregate; I saved them from that prod by getting it front and center (Headgirl was the only other person who got 4 at KPS) and was selected Number 31st alongside Uganda's Top 3 PLE Students (Tumutegyereize, Baingana and Semakadde) admitted by SMACK. The 4th Best Pupil in Uganda was probably a girl who went elsewhere and not to my 1st choice All-Boys School. SMACK was the Best School in Uganda at that time and I chose it not only to maximise the grace on me but also re-meet my best friends from Jinja even if it was Roman Catholic. Going there was a great move because it opened my 3rd eye. I've never harboured thoughts of being a leader (All I care about is money) but got appointed to various positions; started with Column Monitor in P5, then Class Monitor at KPS in P6 and 7. Responsibility was placed on my shoulders at a young age and I had to trust GOD to help me; couldn't do it on my own. Teachers in lower classes would call me to mark test papers for them. Sometimes, I was given the task of signing homework books for boarders (as parents and guardians did for dayschoolers) instead of our matron Madam Namukasa as if I didn't need someone to sign for me. Teachers on duty made me whip middle schoolers for leaving their dormitory late (That was double standards, doing what I hated most but tried to be mild, LORD have mercy!). I was chosen to explain to visitors how the instruments at the school weather station worked and it was a fun learning plus cramming experience. The teacher in charge allocated to me a very technical Campbell - Stokes Sunshine Recorder and I acted like I was a real meteorologist. GOD made us wonderfully; it is possible that our spirits know everything and through dreamvisions we can discover many hidden secrets like Joseph, Daniel, John the Revelator, etc. Sometimes, I would be called to eat specially-prepared ndagala [banana leaf] wrapped food with the teachers in their staffroom. I cannot say it is what I wanted because it made me feel small among adults. One Juma Friday in P6, I went to wash my hands using the water at the tank attached to the girls main dormitory. A Muslim dude taller than me but in a lower class waiting in line twisted my arm to my back for contaminating their wudu ablution water; mbu [that] I was a kafiri [non-believer]. In fact, by that time I was not yet even circumcised plus hadn't uttered the Shahada unlike today. However, when I became Headboy the next year, he would give me right of way and even block other people for me; funny how life turns around. Saturdays were my favourite days because from lunch onwards, we had immense freedom. After supper, movies such as Striking Distance, Sweet Justice, etc were screened on VCR tapes or Sanyu Television. Sunday morning was a weekly outing to the Anglican Church on Najjera-Namugongo-Naalya Road where I took readings sometimes; Catholics went elsewhere but we all returned to buy Ntinda Fried Cassava (NFC) and other edibles from the nearby shops and wooden shacks. My reasoning was probably operating at 90 percent efficiency, without apology. The only Bible book I had read entirely by P7 was Proverbs to get wisdom on how to be a good Headboy or leader like King Solomon. Because of movies eg JESUS (1979) shown at St. Andrew's Church of Uganda (Jinja), animations such as Flying House on UTV, Christian comics, magazines and test papers, I could pinpoint Religious Education answers but didn't know the intricate details in GOD's Word yet. There were very many verses and characters in the Bible I had never seen nor heard about anywhere. Even the black-robed reverend preparing us for Anglican Church Confirmation through evening coaching used to whip learners when they failed questions but I sidestepped him by memorising everything he taught even in Luganda: Matayo, Marko, Luuka, Yohana; it was just absurd. At the end of the following year, I felt hellbound, got sick of talking like Notorious B.I.G. (Christopher Wallace), became saved after watching Carman perform "Serve The LORD" on six-month old Lighthouse Television (LTV) and vowed in my heart to remain silent until I had read the entire Bible which I finished in Senior 3 (during 1999), then started recording my dreamvisions. The first time I returned to my birthplace after leaving permanently was a 1996 Nkokonjeru field trip with my class. The standout song in our tour taxi that rainless day was a hit from Ragga Dee: Bamusakata kiboko nazimatira [S/he was given canes which s/he appreciated]; the boys sang along loudly. At Nyanza Textile Industry Limited (NYTIL), the teachers called me to have lunch (matoke and meat) at the workers dining. They respectfully introduced me to everyone as Headboy whereas at Nile Breweries where the scent in the air alone intoxicated me, I correctly answered a question that won me the prize of a custom-designed 30 centimeter measurement ruler. It was a lovely souvenir that continuously reminded me of the Adventure Capital of East Africa. I thank all the Kalinabiri teachers for being extremely kind to me! Load-shedding from Uganda Electricity Board (UEB) that had apartments nearby was countered using amazingly bright pressure lanterns. Having grown up near the Owen Falls Dam, load-shedding for hours on end was so rare to me that when it surfaced as a PLE question, I misspelt my answer as "lode-shedding". Finally, I loved my Ntinda school and everybody in it, but hated academic canes with all my blood. Leaving KPS spankings behind was a very huge relief. Please, stop academic punishment; it's like etisa or itisa [bum-slapping with a woodstick] in Lugbara language! What is Plan G? It's trusting in GOD. Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your FATHER in Heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask HIM (Luke 11:11-13)! Praise GOD in every situation! Be careful what you ask for, you might receive it! YAHWEH is not limited like humans. HIS arm is not too short (Numbers 11:23). In 2005 while in my 2nd Year at UCU Mukono, I applied to New Vision as an intern editorial cartoonist; I wasn't picked but Mr. Ras kept my file intact. Meanwhile, my Dean at the Journalism Faculty (Ben Bella Ilakut: No excuses!) recommended me among eight scholars as a reporter; only three were chosen by Vision Group due to budget constraints, so I reused my recommendation letter to apply to BusinessWeek Newspaper and Procurement News Magazine (The former sent me to interview Juliana Kanyomozi but failed to gather data though we talked on phone). My debonair Itesot lecturer (Samuel Apedel) who was the Editor of Sunday Vision advised me to write topical Letters to the Editor which was my publishing breakthrough. At home hiding in an unused shophouse, I painstakingly drew campus cartoons in a B5 book format which got me the editorial cartooning job at UCU's bi-monthly newspaper two years later; my pre-2006-graduation lecturer Wanyama Wangah was on the interviewing panel. He became my first supervisor at the campus paper and phoned me to meet Mr. Ras in 2009 for advice plus fill in for the veteran artist while he went on leave between Christmas 2010 and Sunday 16th January 2011; I was beckoned from Arua on a Saturday for a very unmissable Monday appointment with Chief Photo Editor Jimmy Adriko. Although I noticed a mysterious, painless cut oozing blood on my lower left arm in Arua just before the call, I acknowledge GOD for the opportunity. Even Food Guide writer and UCU classmate Roger Mugisha who brought my 2005 application file to New Vision came to the Photo Section to witness my dream come true after half a decade. What do you do when you get exactly what you want? You realise that GOD gives you more than what you actually begged for eg You ask for a cup of juice, HE gives you a kavera full of mangoes or lemons (Go figure!): I appreciated my simpler UCU job much much more after one month at 1st Street, Industrial Area even though it was 33 kilometers away; afterall UCU paid New Vision to print my artwork. Enjoy your struggles while chasing whatever you really want! GOD knows what we need and usually provides it, but we are blinded by our wants. Contentment is free happiness. GOD can answer any prayers; delays are not rejections: It took me three consecutive years of failed application attempts to finally be admitted to the 2008 Maisha Filmlab where I met an actress who transformed my Art a dozen years later. She reminds me of the first girl I ever loved like myself before P3. I have worked for International Alert, Arua District Local Government, WWF, Electoral Commission, my own venture (AikoGraphics) with plans of an online YESU Magazine, etc. It was all GOD's grace, not kiboko. Be careful that you do not forget the LORD, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery (Deuteronomy 6:12)! I thank GOD for getting me through all the paddling danger in P7 alive by enhancing my memory retention and guesswork; I survived the school feud unhurt. Mr. Danze would visit our class after sunrise and give mental work; inspired me to cram the multiplication table especially since I wore a grey coat and blue trousers (Only boy without shorts). He also taught us complex Circle Geometry fit for technical schools. It was fun though very hard. Bigups to all the KPS staff (both male and female teachers who managed us plus the muscular Chef Masaba who had daughters in the school; nurses; matrons and other workers: Gatemen were lenient because every Sunday, boarders walked out of bounds for Church anyway). Kalinabiri Primary School was started by Shem Kiseke Mukwaba Tabyetisse around 1949. GOD is great!

LESSONS FROM LIFE: We trust in GOD...

JESUS Christ is Lord (Philippians 2:11)... Noone comes to the FATHER except through the Way (John 14:6)...

S/he who has two eyes can see...

A bad beginning makes a good ending...

For GOD so loved the world that HE gave HIS only begotten Son, that whoever believes in HIM should not perish but have everlasting life (John 3:16 Gideon Memorial Bible)...

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction (Proverbs 1:7)...

I am the LORD your GOD... You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything... You shall not bow down to them or worship them... You shall not misuse the name of the LORD... Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy (Exodus 20:1-8)...

Say to wisdom, 'You are my sister,' and to insight, 'You are my relative.' (Proverbs 7:4)...

Learning never ends...

Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise - why destroy yourself? Do not be overwicked, and do not be a fool - why die before your time? (Ecclesiastes 7:16-17)...

Adapt to your new environment...

Read, read, read...

Noone is born knowing everything...

Now is the time...

Launch in the deep...

Be known by works...

If we don't tell our stories, noone else will...

Memorise the 10 Commandments from Moses until you can recite them backwards...

Even if you drop out of school, you still have to make financial papers (Money)...

Everything you are looking for is right next to you...

English and Mathematics (ABC123) are the foundation of education; Science and Social Studies are the walls plus roof...

Forgive easily...

Old students (alumni) associations provide networks that are like clans...

Too much love will heal you...

Pray Until Something Happens (P.U.S.H.)...

Pray Until Lucifer Leaves (P.U.L.L.)...

Pain ends with time...

All I need to learn is Agriculture, Architecture and Art...

Kampala is not buildings, but people...

Money is just a number; study Mathematics...

When you lose, accept defeat and train to win the next match...

A child should not be punished just because they do not know the squareroot of 25...

People who dress half-naked must not complain about attracting attention...

Humans change colours...

Be creative...

Pray without Ceasing (PwC)...

It's not how hard you pushed along the way, it's having something in you to finish... Don't break when you're broken... Have the courage to fail (Michael Jordan)...

Keep on keeping on...

Don't be evil...

Make things...

Accept failure (LeBron James)...

Be formless... shapeless, like water (Bruce Lee)...

Rice mixed with cabbage is food for winners...

Katogo [Fresh cassava boiled with beans] is delicious during Saturday lunch...

Exams are simply tests to certify to employers hiring for jobs that you have studied certain required things. If you want to learn a skill or anything else for personal use, you can read about it without an exam...

Read ahead...

GOD provides...

Muslims perform ablution before prayer...

There are two types of women: Pearls you love more, but Diamonds love you more...

School bullies better watch out or else their victimised targets might feed them rat poison in bread...

When rain falls, store it in a tank instead of complaining that there is no water...

Stay calm, your difficulties will end...

One year is not a very long time when you divide it into three or four parts...

Lucifer is the other name of Satan (The Devil); he's not just a beautiful angel...

Read your Bible, pray everyday...

A shirt can dry in two hours if you waveshake it hard first before hanging up in the open air...

Read harder...

Even people who hate you can smile for you...

Do not fight your schoolmates...

Accept JESUS into your heart...

Pay attention...

Only GOD can stop you...

Love is a free gift...

Keep your good friends closer than enemies...

Diamonds are forever...

In the name of JESUS Christ of Nazareth, pass the test...

Corporal punishment (including 40 stripes) should only be applied for thefts, promiscuity and other forbidden behaviour, not lack of knowledge...

Spoil the rod and spare the child...

Bedwetting is managed by covering a mattress with a liquidproof material such as macintosh or leather; not spanking the bedwetter...

Jump academic canes or die reading...

Ignorance is not bliss, but neither is it a criminal offence...

Every pupil has intelligence; the variety is enormous. School should be a place that allows freewill discovery plus development of talents not pressurised cramwork...

Find the correct answers...

Laziness is the thin line between knowhow and action...

Performing Last in exams is not the end of the future...

Success is a choice...

Money can't buy love, but it can buy cassava...

Edu-ke-shoni is the key to success...

Knowledge is wealth...

Even if you go and fight courageously in battle, GOD will overthrow you before the enemy, for GOD has the power to help or to overthrow (2nd Chronicles 25:8)...

Health is wealth...

Questions plus ideas equals answers... The solution to any problem is in the problem itself...

No sleeping all day...

Less talk, more reading...

A stitch in time saves nine...

Justice is sweet...

Imagine Uganda Police was only robots to keep law and order...

Read the dictionary...

Win, lose or draw...

Unlearn to relearn...

Go through the motions...

Everything comes from GOD...

Do not deceive yourselves. If any of you think you are wise by the standards of this age, you should become 'fools' so that you may become wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in GOD's sight. As it is written: 'HE catches the wise in their craftiness' (1st Corinthians 3:18-19)... 

Ignorance [Freeing your mind] is an asset for learning...

The education system is not entirely bad, it's the learner's application system that needs proper tuning...

Love is energy that brings out the best in people...

English is my 2nd language; Lugbara (mother tongue) first. Lusoga, Luganda, Swahili, German, French, Runyankole, Chinese, etc can follow...

If you think you have reached the top, then the only place to go next is down until you hit rock bottom...

Be humble, no matter how much you know, there are people who know more than you...

It's my life (Bon Jovi)...

The sun and moon cannot meet but they share the same light...

When you are at the top, calm down because one day you will come down...

GOD is very fair...

Happiness comes from within...

Love back everyone who loves you; respect them as well...

Read or cry...

I am the King of Sorrow (Sade)...

Even if I walk through the valley of the shadow of kiboko, I will fear no evil for THOU art with me...

Actions speak louder than lip-service...

Keep studying...

Exercise (Fagil Mandy)...

When tired, just rest...

You cannot trade peace for anything (Desire Luzinda)...

JESUS is for everybody...

When you are at the top, you become a topic...

Ships sink not because of the ocean outside but inside them...

Azi de-i ku [Lugbara Translate: Work never ends]...

Masturbation is evil...

Do not covet Uriah's wife...

Pray, pray, pray...

Stay disciplined...

Fast and pray...

Any knowledge can lead to new knowledge...

Do not agonise, but organise (Elly Tumwine)...

Ashame the Devil...

Constructive criticism is a hump but spiteful insults are potholes...

Carry your cross...

I grew up on posho and beans...

If JESUS is GOD, then whom did HE pray to?

Pain is normal but suffering is optional...

Turn your pain into Art...

The blessing of the LORD brings wealth, without painful toil for it (Proverbs 10:22)...

Find alternative energy...

Know what you want...

Do not tap out...

Be comfortable being uncomfortable...

You are what you know...

"They will fight against you but will not overcome you, for I am with you and will rescue you," declares the LORD (Jeremiah 1:19)...

MUNGU awa drileba ndundu [Lugbara 4: GOD has distributed blessings differently] (Leila Chandiru)...

Money like school marks is just a number...

Life is what you make it...

Food is compulsory...

Pipo gon' tok wetha yu r doing bad or gud (Rihanna)...

LGBTQI+ is from the Devil...

Love GOD with all your heart... Love your neighbour as you love yourself...

Be brief and concise...

Eat the bamboo shoots that were used to whip you in school like elephants, pandas, Bagisu and Oriental Asians. The tender, crunchy sprouts taste like corn and when cooked for 30 minutes or two hours can be very sweet...

Being Last in Class doesn't make somebody daft nor stupid...

Shabbat Shalom!

Elevate yourself to the Next Level...

In order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the LORD to take it away from me. But HE said to me, "MY grace is sufficient for you, for MY power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong (2nd Corinthians 12:7-10)...

Get saved or die repenting...

The best discovery is finding out that JESUS (The Lamb of GOD who takes away the sins of the world) was crucified to save us from Hellfire...

Good things come to an end...

GOD is the Alpha and Omega...

Hope School Anthem: We young women and men of Uganda/ Are marching along the path of education/ Singing and dancing with joy together/ Uniting for a better Uganda.// 1. We are the pillar of tomorrow's Uganda/ Let us rise now embrace true knowledge/ Yielding disciplined resourcefulness/ To rebuild a great, great Pearl.// 2. We know the way into the land of enlightenment has thorns, creepers, vales and mountains/ Come what may we shall overcome/ For the glorious times to come.// 3. Parents and teachers and the youths of this nation/ Rise with us, support our endeavours/ Lead by GOD who is the Source of Life/ To uplift our motherland!

THE END