Wednesday

DOCTOR LOVE (Arua) Quotes

John Milton Anguyo is Arua's Doctor Love (Mr. Loverman) who has an enjoyable Radio Show called "Love Clinic" at 8 PM on Voice of Life (VOL 100.9 FM) every Monday Night. During some weddings, the former Arua Urban Archdeacon is also a Main Celebrant. His "Nile Counselling Office has helped over 100 clients". Located on Circular Road, about 7 blocks from Golden Courts Hotel and next to Mazzolidi House (Sisters of the Sacred Heart of Christ), his ministry can be reached via 0772-345733. Below are some of his Love Sayings:

Marriage is ordained by GOD, share the Word in Jesus' Name...

Express true love, so that your home stands strong...

Don't play with love issues or like animals. Aje (Marriage) should be through lots of love and not jokes. Only death can separate the couple. Two become one, those GOD brings together, no man should put asunder! Build a home, not for one year then turn around! Man leaves his parents to unite with his wife...

If you think you will break up, don't get married! Even if things are good or bad, stand firm...

Woman should say, "I will be with you forever even if you have a disease. Even if your hairs or teeth fall off, I'll die with you..."

Cook food without salt when your man is sick out of love...

No money, doesn't mean you should leave your man...

A good marriage is based more on true love and committment not feeling nor animal attraction...

GOD made two important pronouncements: 1. One must first know that marriage is a permanent irrevocable agreement that binds husband and wife forever... Mark 10:6-9; 2. When two people marry willingly out of true love, they promise to be faithful regardless of what happens to each other whether good or bad. Husband afflicted with swellings on his body, bald-headed, gap-hole man, no job, loses a leg. Not a punishment, true love survives all this. Some men are exciting, they may try to distruct you... Love is magnetic, Mva ma ari 'de ma dria 'de'de... (Lugbara 4: The Boy's essence just dropped on my head...) You never want to part somebody's company, you click. There's somebody GOD created for you, when you meet, everything is good. The rib...

For husband, even if she loses her beauty, becomes less submissive, causes you problem in bed or with money and you get annoyed; She might put much salt and you make a lot of noise, Jews divorce because of salt (600 rules); Even if she loses weight, instead of working on her - feed her well, buy cosmetics and dresses, you are to blame! Men help your wives jointly to maintain each other's beauty, correct one another, mistakes are human. Even men make mistakes, it's just women keep quiet. There is no perfect husband nor wife, you just perfect yourselves when you marry...

True colours come out during marriage...

You cannot marry all the women on earth to find out the best... Some men who go out for other women behave like those ones are different and have three breasts. All women on earth have two breasts...

In marriage, according to GOD, a husband and wife are a team. There is a blueprint for marriage in Genesis 2:18-25. A team is two people working together. If you have true love for each other, wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend, you will work together as a team without complaint...

Love and Marriage, put everything in the right channel... When you work as a team, you speak the right language...

You say you are in love but send SMS messages abusing each other. You make appointments, but don't show up, you dodge each other...

Pay school fees together, sleep together, work in the garden together. There are some men who dig with their wives...

If you beat your wife passionately, you are just beating yourself because a wife is taken from the man's rib...

[A listener called during one Monday Night Show with a problem: Was in a relationship, went with his girlfriend for interview, boy passed. Girl is given job in same workplace and manager wants relationship. Girl's phone disappears and boy doesn't know what to do...] Pray! Jeremiah 29:11 GOD has a plan for you... True love is sacrifice. Love cannot be forced. GOD might be saving you from trouble. Meet her face to face and discuss, love has no fear. If she loves the job more than you, maybe you will find another girlfriend...

Saturday

The 2008 Maisha Filmlab

By May 2008, I had somehow given up on the year's Maisha Filmlab till probably the next year - after applying around January - simply because selections had already been made and I wasn't on the list published on the Maisha Website, but was divinely satisfied when my dreams mysteriously came true on short-notice 2 days before the start of the 2008 Filmlab (Probably a tithe to KPC [Kampala Pentecostal Church] opened a door for me to replace Kenyan Gad Wesonga. I was the only male Ugandan screenwriter). I had to complete most of the things I was obliged to urgently do before going to the Royal Impala Hotel in Munyonyo, a few hundred metres away from the fantastic Commonwealth Speke Resort. Maisha is a Ugandan NGO that trains new filmmakers. I enjoyed so much during the 22 (actually 25) day workshop including Sudhir Ruparelia's Speke Resort Munyonyo (with Mark and David), Efendy's Turkish Restaurant; Ndere Centre where I danced to a Lugbara tune "Ama Woro Anji Mungu ni" meaning "We are all GOD's Children" with Vincho; Rides to town for National Theatre public workshops; The tea, buffet, and drinks at Royal Impala, Eating chicken daily at RIHM; The evening film screenings and discussions ... Vincho Nchogu (the Girl whom I got interested about most, I called her Leonardo da Vincho during the first days, you know, that Mona Lisa stuff, right? She was lively, social, incredibly knowledgeable about Kampala City's best spots, carefree and most of all very intelligent [Her screenplay was about how China wined Zimbabwe instead of his housemates Britain, Roafrica (Rest of Africa) and Usamerica] ... Don McKellor (the Don Guan or Don Corleone of Canadian Cinema, I actually want to become the Don McKellor of Ugandan Movies), Musarait (She is a very gifted manager, we should acknowledge her skills), Myles (Stalking us with his camera), Sabrina (Lovely Indian lady from Delhi married to Steve; Her baby son Kabir [Hebrew for 'Big'] was really fun to be with), Ami (Musarait's assistant on the management team without whom film screenings and editing work would be very hard, "You are so good to me, Edward!" just being kind), Steve Cohen, Semi Chellas (She made me believe in myself), Patricia (a Kenyan born Ugandan who writes for 'African Woman' magazine), David, Angela (like an angel), Pithon, Mark (very comedic and witty), Judith (the second female Ugandan representative), Rachael plus Craig (Editing) and Maria (Directing) - mentors who came later, plus the technical crew (participants Emmanuel, versatile riot - loving NTV cameraman Abubaker, Henry the Kenyan Artist, the Sound maestro on 'Team B' named George, Afro-styled Anthony and Tanzanian Richard also on 'Team B', Shantos who was involved in the production of Irene Kulabako's "All Our Children" movie shot in January 2008, Godfrey and Hoclay); actors: the artistically gifted John Mary Mukiza, lively Samuel Lutaaya, beautiful and upfront Maureen Nankya, Roger, Leroy and Eva plus technical mentors: the guile Giles Khan, authoritative Shenny, Annie, the wise Barry Braverman and hotel staff including Nabira, Hellen, Isaac, Alex and Kyeyune in addition to the receptionists Henry, Isaac & Joyce ... plus the actors who came last - Maurice, the soulful phenomenon, Prynce Joel Okuyo, John Mary Mukiza, Maureen Nankya, Eva Tumwesigye, Esther, Keloy, Roger and others, Runners Timothy Tabaaro, Paul Mugisha and elder Zippy's beautiful sister. Although my script wasn't among the shootable 3 out of 9, Life was still Beautiful. I had a wonderful boat cruise on Lake Victoria from the Kabaka's Landing Site with 6 of my fellow screenwriters after the 9 of us all decided to abandon our Speke Resort Munyonyo sojourn because of what we heard about cruise prices from the guards at the gate. Rachael stayed on shore while Mark had a storyboard to make with Richard and Barry at Nyakaana's site. I joined them after the ride where we got close to Bulingugwe Island - a 'suitable zone for romance' according to the boat captain (Actually paid the total 14,000 UgShs required from all of the Maisha passengers as a token of my appreciation for the family they had created though Angela gave me half of her fee); Wednesday evening on the 13th of August after the actors had left was Craig, the Editing mentor's birthday. We had a bash with delicious cake, drinks and photos. I won't forget the group snap with the Birthday Man. Shenny from Delhi, India was also saying farewell ...

Ask Don, he went back to Canada with the idea I gave him that "We were in a heavenly prison ... (Royal Impala is like a Garden of Paradise)"

Why Wyclef?

"I heard a man say 'Jesus walks', me myself I heard Jesus talk." He told Aiko, "If you have a problem, just look up to Heaven!" Do you ever ask yourself 'why 'Clef and not any other singer? Of all the musicians that have come to Uganda in the last few months (Cece Winans, Akon came up too fast - "Lonely" was like his first big track in the mid 2000s, Kirk Franklin, UB40, Brick & Lace, Collee Buddz, Elephant Man and next Shaggy on 9th August), Wyclef stands out for me as the Most Enjoyed Artiste. I started hearing his songs in the 90s when he was with the Fugees ... "Ready or Not" around 1997 was dream-like, fantastic stuff. During my Senior 4 vacation (December 2000 - May 2001), I did not spend more than one day without hearing "Tell my mama, I'm in love with a stripper, yo!" on 91.3 Capital FM. It was a spiritually philosophical jam. I like the part where he castigated guys who lie that they won't go to the strip joints, "He without sin cast the first stone."
"You don't have to be a millionaire, to get a ticket up to the moon. We all know somebody up there. If you need a helping hand, look I'm right here." Well for Ugandans, 'the Preacher's Son' will be at the Lugogo Cricket Oval on Friday night 1st August to take them over the moon with songs like "Fast Car" for only 35,000 UgShs, that is way less than a million. Also, Celtel Uganda will unveil its new pink and black 'Zain' image.
'Clef fuses an element of reggae with hiphop soul and churns out mentally stimulating hits. Recently, I think he did a collaboration with a rock group, continuing the mash-up trend where rock meets other genres."Sweetest Girl", a collaboration with Lil' Wayne, Akon (Remix with Raekwon) is a deeply moving track, actually inspired my 2008 Maisha Filmlab Screenplay. I had already given up but because I overheard this song, it kind of gave me new ideas and amazingly, I made it to the Filmlab on short notice with my piece. So honestly, Wyclef is like a modern day prophet to me...
When I passed by Lugogo 4 hours before the show, there wasn't much excitment near the Oval ... There was only Zain's new branding advertised but by the time fans started going in, you could see a remarkably humongous queue. Where had all these guys been enjoying 'Clef's music?

Unfortunately, the star did not appear till about midnight leaving many fans wishing they hadn't paid, the delay pierced their hearts. Someone please call 9 - 1 - 1! Can they pick up the phone? Why not try 999, the line for Uganda Police?


[More Coming Soon]

Friday

'Talking about ... ' a Good Book



[First Printed in 1983 by Semu Printers, Second Edition by Design Centre in 2010] Here is a sneek Preview of what to expect in the book "Talking about Talking" by James E.O. Dramani. Go out into bookstores near you and buy the book (Call 0772-662415 in Arua or 0772-624952 in Kampala for a copy) to get more revelation about one man's hilarious experiences and observations from the 1960s to the 2000s ... Good Reading



"Talking can take various forms. You may talk orally, or in writing, or in signs. Whatever the form used, it aims at communicating something to somebody.

When one talks, one may talk dangerously or randomly as I am going to talk. Whatever I am going to say will be said without order. One may also talk seriously or jokingly or foolishly or shamefully. Others talk big, in contrast to small talkers. You may talk blasphemy or gossip or secrets. Whatever you talk, your talk can be described by one of the numerous adjectives of the ‘European mouth’ or other languages of the world. There’s always a reason that makes one to talk. Be it anger, drunkenness, happiness or what have you. One’s state of mind at any given moment will dictate the tone to use when one talks. Soft voice for love and amusement; Harsh one for rebukes; and authoritative voice for bigness. Drunkards talk anything whether embarrassing or not. Quiet people become noisy under influence of drinks and go to the extent of revealing secrets, even their affairs with their wives. Happiness also makes one say a lot of things.


The subject matter of talking does not take one form. It may be political, academic, professional, or a layman’s talk. The interest of listening is roused by who talks on what and the language used for language joins people more easily than other ways. The ability to perceive what is talked about is dependant on the listener’s knowledge of the subject talked about, or his state of mind at that very moment. It may depend on his status in life or educational background.

In works of a title like this one, there can be no list of contents or chapters as everything just comes randomly and in a confused manner. I am going to talk and talk, almost without stopping but there will have to be a stop to all that I want to talk about. My talk may appear as if it points a finger at you. But No! I am talking at random on anything without mentioning names. My talk may amuse you, it may annoy others or it may leave others unaffected. Whatever it does to you, you can re-read the title and see if it rhymes with the contents for ‘talking’ can mean ay kind of talking.

Now going to talking, it is oral talk which the majority of people practice, for some do not write and the dumb and deaf ones use sign talking only. All the three forms are used by lucky ones who have ability and opportunity to use them all.

One’s oral talk has to be audible or else one may be considered talking to oneself. I for one, I do not talk audibly. Those who know me may wonder what I save my voice for, or whether GOD did not expect me to use my vocal cord fully. It is not me alone who is a victim of talking to oneself. There are others far worse than me I guess. Like our sweet talkers of the fair sex who fear to be taken as noisy creatures – for reasons best known to themselves. And so they talk as if they are just two in a bed where whispers are not supposed to be heard beyond the walls of the paradise room. The ‘bazungu’ say that you swallow your words as if the words are something to be eaten. Talking inaudibly will make the listeners beg so many of your pardons very much to your annoyance as you might wonder, without realizing that the fault is yours whether you are talking to deaf people or not. It may even cause loss of interest in what you talk. You are eventually labeled a bore. On the other hand there are those who talk audibly, but too loudly. Although they achieve the aim of talking that is communicating something to somebody, their talk is almost noise making rather than pleasurable sound to the ear. Even if people are in a small place, close to each other, such loud talkers never change the volume of their voices. They are only fit to address rallies in open air or big halls. They keep awake those addicted to sleeping during gatherings. Such are the right people for the Alleluyah Group or the Gospel Church where shouting is the order of the day. Or else they ought to shout in mosques every morning to awaken people for early morning prayers. Talking of Gospel Church, one may remember the group near Makerere in the late sixties which gave a picture of a mental home. There was no order of talking. Each person shouted at the highest voice. The group was banned in this country but is coming up again with the liberation of Uganda."

Wednesday

Trading for Peace (Draft Documentary Transcript)

Draft Transcript for the Documentary Film produced by INTERNATIONAL ALERT about the ‘Trading for Peace’ plus COMESA STR (Simplified Trade Regime) Meetings in Kasese 20th to 23rd October 2008 and Bwera Trade Fair on 24th October 2008 all organized by COMESA, DFID and USAID in partnership with the Government of Uganda. The theme was “Capacity Building and Cross Border Trade Facilitation”.

ALISON THOMPSON, ROBINAH KAJWENGE and FRIDAH MUSIIME worked on the documentation. The Journalist was EDWARD AIKOBUA and TOM ISINGOMA was the Cameraman.

DAY ONE (Monday 20th October 2008): TAPE 1 & 2
(Timber Trade and Livelihoods in Great Lakes Region)

We interviewed two Congolese Timber Traders plus Ms. FELICITE KALUME NDOOLE, Ministère Provinciale DRC – North Kivu; Ministère de l’Environement Nord – Kivu. Also interviewed was WINNIE KIZZA, MP Kasese (Uganda)… Details and correct spellings of all the names of interviewees can be double checked with the list of participants since we asked them to introduce themselves.

DAY TWO (Tuesday 21st October 2008): TAPE 3 & 4
(COMESA Strategy for Sustainable Timber Trade in the Great Lakes Region)

1. NICK BATES, Political Analyst (DFID – UK)
An Excellent Take; he spoke extensively about this timely initiative to have a forum that brings together different nationals in the COMESA Region and allow them to discuss their disagreements. He elaborated on the themes from the past meetings and also the future. I actually squeezed out of him what was in store for 2009 and he said ‘Energy’ since Congo has many rivers from which hydro-electric power can be tapped. The cameraman commented that this was a big interview for him since the subject in the frame revealed so much and spoke resourcefully. This clip alone contained a lot of important data and has a symbolic view of the Rwenzori Mountains in the background…

2. DAVIES M. BAMULESEYO, Principal Commercial Officer/ Trade at the Ministry of Tourism, Trade and Industry (Uganda)
A Good Take; it was actually very good in terms of content. We got the main man who is Uganda’s National Focal Point in implementing the COMESA STR. Davies spoke about the importance of having such meetings to facilitate trade across borders. As a civil servant, he did not want to be so political, so I avoided asking him the question of government interference in trading. Instead, I asked him what he thought about having information points at the many border posts like Busia-Malaba, Katuna, Vurra (Arua) in addition to the Mpondwe/ Kasindi Border Post. Information most especially about trade across borders as a resource can help build peace.
Trivia: Mr. Bamuleseyo chaired the COMESA STR meetings the following days Wednesday and Thursday alongside Helen Kenani, the COMESA Senior Trade Expert who turned down my request to interview her simply because her secretariat was among the facilitators of the forum…

DAY THREE (Wednesday 22nd October 2008): TAPE 5
(Opening of the COMESA Simplified Trade Regime [STR] workshop)

1. STANLEY PANDASI, General Chairperson of Traders and Representative at Mpondwe Border Post (Customs Market)
A Good Take; he spoke in English mixed with his local language Rukhonzo explaining the problems he is facing and what the people he represents go through. He gave suggestions of what government needs to do. He was a good authority to interview on issues concerning Mpondwe Cross-Border trading…

2. BISWEDE KALIHODI, Market Tenderer (Bwera, Kasese) and Member of the Women Choir Singers’ Group (Uganda)
Excellent Take; she talked in Swahili about taxes being paid in different places for the same good for example when trading fish, you may find yourself paying several people instead of just one officer. Arrests are actually made and this disjointed taxation kills their would-be profits. Her disposition was quite volatile which makes for a good screen presence. She brings out her grievances well and was very smart (on the fashion side). We ‘held for traffic’ (that is stopped recording) twice to allow a loud Bread Van pass at Hotel Margerita…

3. AGNES PASKA, Market Tenderer (Fish Trader) and Chairperson of the Women Choir Singers’ Group (Uganda)
Not a Bad Take; she felt more comfortable speaking her mother tongue Rukhonzi and
revealed that she sells fish at Kasitamu Market (at the border). We asked her to talk about
what she thought of Cross Border Trade and the challenges that constrain her…

4. JEAN - MARCEL MUYA TUMBA, DRC Gouv, Directeur de Promotion Commerciale ; Ministère de Economie Nationale et Commerce Extérieur ; Secrétariat General au Commerce Extérieur ; et Point Focal Principal pour le RECOS/ RDC
A Good Take with the Rwenzori Mountains in the background. Since he is the focal point for DR Congo in implementation of the STR, we allowed him to speak about Cross Border Trade, Conflicts and other setbacks without interruption. He talked about the Trading for Peace Forum; Differences between Congo and Uganda; Problems and appropriate ideas


DAY FOUR (Thursday 23rd October 2008): TAPE 5
(Review of the COMESA STR with the handbook “Making Cross Border Trade Simplified”)

1. KISITU ASADU KIGOZI, Uganda Revenue Authority (URA) Customs Officer Mpondwe (Western Uganda)
Early morning capture…Very Important Take because the previous day, participants asked for the presence of at least one Customs Official to contribute to their forum and let his employers know the achievements of the ‘Trading for Peace’ and COMESA STR Forum…

DAY FIVE (Friday 24th October 2008): TAPE 6
(Trade Fair at Bwera Primary Teachers College)

Besides the interviews on the final day of filming, also captured on Tape 6 were the Bwera College students singing the Uganda National Anthem and another song to make the guests “feel at home”. The Trade Fair was like a cross border trade market with various items on display including bitenge, padlocks, juice, whisky, clothes, cosmetics, fruits, sugar, packaged products, stoves, agricultural foodstuffs, sandals, charcoal, glycerine, cooking oil, air time cards (most notably from Warid Telecom that had a conspicuous umbrella), shampoo and much more. Rather peculiar were logs of timber on display. The chief guest Chairman LC (Local Council) 5 Canon Julius Kithaghenda led the inspection of stalls. His speech came after the Principal of Bwera Teachers College; the LC 3; M. Damien Kamashi - President de la F.E.C/ Beni and another delegate were asked to say a word. Below are the people interviewed…

1. SOSTENE BWAMBALE, Bitenge Trader (Uganda)
Fair Take though shot while the Guest of Honour was giving his speech in the background. Sostene talked about revenue officials not giving them fixed prices and advised government to stabilize pricing…

2. ANGELUS MUHINDO, Bwera Solar and General Electricals, Power Equipment Supplier (Uganda)
A Good Take; one of his challenges was that people do not buy solar equipment because of prices. He advised government to reduce on (importation) taxes so that prices also fall. His eloquence in English smoothened our interchange. Basing on the fact that the Principal of Bwera Teachers College revealed (during his speech) that the school had an inadequate solar system installed as far back as 1995, Muhindo’s presence at the fair should have been of great interest to the administrators plus students besides other consumers…

3. (Hajjati) MASIKA TAUSI MWANAIDI, Bitenge Trader (Congo)
A Good Take; though the music was still loud. She spoke Swahili and complained about revenue authorities who put them in trouble. She begged that they also hear what the traders have to say…

4. MARGRET KINENE, Foodstuffs Trader (Uganda)
A Fairly Good Take; the entertainment deejay could not play his music at low decibels but we managed to find out that Kinene sells foodstuffs like bananas, cassava, pineapples, irish and sweet potatoes (a local favourite). Margret spoke her local tongue Rukhonzo and told us a very important point that as a handicapped Ugandan (lame person), she is not charged anything while trading in Congo. She was dressed in a yellow NRM (National Resistance Movement) T-shirt with the 2006 election campaign face of the ruling Ugandan President His Excellency Yoweri Kaguta Museveni. This was a great political statement because M7’s regime has really worked hard to empower women including rural agriculturalists. Unfortunately, we did not capture another piece of information about how she has educated her daughter up to Senior Four (That is the age when Ugandan girls are ready for marriage) but does not have money to sponsor her further. She added that the father died when the girl finished Primary Seven, about four classes behind. This human interest information can be used in a voice over or caption talking about Margret…

5. MASEREKA YONA HAYI, Timber Importer (Uganda)
His problems include among others Untrustworthy Congolese: Some Congolese run with their money; Secondly, when you load timber, Congolese officials beg for money with no reciept yet Congolese traders have no problem in Uganda; In the third place, even a Ugandan with a VISA faces problems - he gets phone calls looking for him or is chased; Finally, sometimes when you check timber bought, you find that it is the worst…

6. MOSES BALUKU, Timber Importer (Uganda)
Very Brief Take; Baluku had a similar grievance as Yona’s last, mentioned to me off camera how Congolese sell them rejects of timber...

Thursday

Nyakuni is One of Uganda's Richest

James Nyakuni, one of the richest people in Uganda, is known for the fleet of white GaaGaa buses that ply the Kampala - West Nile route. He started in a humble way. After dropping out of school in P7 he went into brickmaking and building before starting a stall in Arua dealing in metal fabrications. Later, he tried a bicycle spares shop. It is trading in fuel and cigarettes that saw him travel to Nairobi occasionally on business trips out of which his business acumen was nourished. He established a business branch in northeastern DR Congo before venturing into transportation. Nyakuni is also a real estate mogul with expensive houses in Arua and Kampala. (Copyright www.encyclopedia.com)

Monday

Translate Lugbara to English

Lugbara AI

Language Model/ Corpus/ Simplified Text Dataset of Lugbara Phrases (Sentences for Machine Learning):

How do you say "Thanks!" in Lugbarati? Awa'difo!
Translate "Angu owi 'bo!" to English! The place has dawned already/ The sun has risen.

IMPORTANT RULES for AI FINE-TUNING: Lugbara words are written the way they are pronounced. Every word ends with a vowel... Adding suffixes -ka, -ma, -nga, -ta, -za to verbs creates nouns... Adding the suffix -ru to nouns (which can be used as male-given names) creates adjectives (which can be used as female-given names)... The letter C is always pronounced Ch like Church... In clusters DJ, GB and KP, the first letter is silent; meanwhile MV is pronounced NV and NZ is NJ... Some words that start with E can start with I while those that start with O can start with U eg in Aringati or other dialects... Apostrophe before B, D, W and Y denotes the sound H... The word ra after a verb denotes positive emphasis while ku denotes opposite... Some words have multiple meanings depending on three (to four) tones or the context...

Lugbara Translate:

A ga (si)! = I refuse!
A ka mi ne. = When I see you.
A le chai na (3)! = I want three cups of tea!
A le enya! = I want food!
A le ku! = I do not want!
A le lonyi icekoko. = I need (want without missing) wealth.
A le mi! = I love you/ I want you!
A le mi ambamba! = I love you very much!
A le mi ku. = I do not love/ want you.
A le mi tu! = I love you very much!
A le mi tu. = I want to kick you.
A le mu ku. = I do not want to go.
A le spageti ambamba! = I love spaghetti alot!
A le yi mvuzaru! = I want drinking water!
A le yi ojizuru! = I want water for washing/ bathing!
A mvu chai suluwayiwayi si. = I drank tea with small donuts.
A nda ti. = I searched for long.
A va ra. = I understand/ understood.
Abutze ni 'be ambo izu ndeni Westi Nailu-a ri. = Abutze is the Tallest Mountain in West Nile.
ADRO le Lugbara tu. = GOD loves the Lugbara very much.
A'di le ma ra? Ma-i! A'dusi? = Who loves me? It's me! Why?
A'di yo! = No war!
ADRO le ama woro. = GOD loves all of us.
A'du iji mi ma dukani-a (ni)? = What brings you to my shop?

Agu azi ci aapi desi 'ba aga 'Be ambo Wati. = There is a man who lives across Mountain Wati.
Agupi azi-a. = Men at work!
Agupi azia! = Six men!
Aita ma mba kongolo. = Faith should grow hardened.
Aje ni isi 'bo. = The price has reduced already.
Aje ni si? = How much is the price?
Aju mani. = The spear is mine/ for me.
Ajuru ni imbapi. = Ajuru is a teacher.
Aku mi ku! = I won't leave you!
Ama aa 'ba si. = We stay/ exist because of people.
Ama ayikoru! = We are happy!
Ama 'di. = We are here.
Ama mi inzi, MUNGU! = We worship you, GOD!
Ama mu drile; a cani go vile ku. = We are moving/ going forward; we won't go back.
Ama nga ama le ewule ewule. = We will love each other forever.
Amaguru ni aa Landani-a. = Amaguru stays in London.
Amena! = Amen!
Amuki Mvara-a! = Let us go to Mvara!
Amvu orodriru. = A farm is valuable.
Angu amadri tu ku asi onzi si. = Our place does not rise/ develop because of bad heart.
Aniako adreni ayiko ku. = Ignorance/ Lack of knowledge is not bliss.
Angusara si, afa woro ni i-oja o'di. = At dawn, everything turns new.
Anya i'di funo ala si alu saaru. = Millet porridge with groundnut paste is very tasty.
Aringati Lugbarati le. = Aringa language is like Lugbara language.
Arojo ngoa? = Where is the hospital/ medicine-house?
Arua alu mengu ika-orenjisiri le. = Arua is tasty like a red-orange mango.
Arua 'dale, onyi ci. = That side of Arua, there is niceness.
Arua Hilu ni avi Onduparaka be. = Arua Hill is playing with Onduparaka.
Asindriza aga lonyi. = Peace is better than wealth/ property.
Asindriza Kristo ni 'ba dria ni. = The peace of Christ for all.
Ata mba, kirikiri! = (Also) man, please!
Awa'difo irita si! = Thanks for listening!
Awa'difo mini! = Thank you!
Awania! = Thanks!
Ayiko 'bu-a. = Happiness is in heaven.
Ayiko mani ci, YESU oji onzi mani. = There is happiness for me, JESUS washed my sins.
Ayiko ni ma fu! = Happiness is killing me/ I'm happy!
Ayiko nyaku-a ci! = There is happiness on earth!
Ayiko nyaku-a yo! = No happiness on earth!
Ayivu ma Opi ica Agofe suzori. = The Ayivu Chief became the 4th Paramount Chief (of Lugbara Kari).
Ayota ma so pa eyi ma pari-a. = Rules (must) stand in their place/ Terms apply.
'Ba/ Bha da sende tawuni-a tipasi. = Money was poured in town using a tipper.
'Ba gasia ive acisi. = Garbage/ Rubbish/ Trash is burnt using fire.
'Ba nde YESU si. = People win through JESUS.
Belinda ni kriketi avi. = Belinda plays cricket.
Bongomini ni Acoli. = Bongomin is an Acholi.
Briketi 'ba ide karatasi aapi yi ma alea cika o'du iri risi. = Brickets are made using papers that have stayed in water for at least two days.
Chandi ci. = There is sadness/ sorrow/ misery.
Dipresoni peta ni. = Depression is a choice.
'Di ma wa'di/ ago/ oku. = This is my partner/ husband/ wife (woman).
Doro ni Muyindi. = Doro is an Indian.
E 'ba mi cika! = (You have) put yourself better off!
E 'ba mupira vaa! = Put the ball down!
E gba mani simu! = Ring/ call me!
E ka te ise osiza ma nga mi ti-a, mi te sawa izu. = If you wait for fried grasshoppers to fly into your mouth, (then) you wait a long time.
E ka tro le ra, e ka tro le ku. = Even if you want, even if you don't.
E la muke! = Sleep well!
E le a'du(ni)? = What do you want?
E nda! = Search!
E nga azi! = Work!
E nga mini ngari! = Do the work you are doing/ Mind your work!
E (n)zi jotile! = Open the door!
E va ra? = Did/ Do you understand?
Ediofe ni kala etu ni 'dezuri-a. = Ediofe is on the side where the sun sets/ West side.
Ee! = Yes!
Emi imu YESU vu! = Come to JESUS!
Emi we emi yofe si! = Come in large numbers/ Sweep yourselves with a broom!
Emili ni Ostrelia-a. = Emily is in Australia.
Enya 'di alu tu! = This food is very delicious!
Enyasa za si. = Cassava slapfood/ bread with meat.
Enyau ni ra Nailu Miri-a. = Enyau flows into the Nile River.
Eri adungu avi. = S/he is playing the West Nile bow-harp.
Eri buku la. = S/he is reading a book.
Eri fe ma asi ni su. = S/he makes my heart pain.
Eri ma dri onzi! = S/he has a bad head/ is stubborn!
Eri makaroni nya. = S/he eats/ is eating macaroni.
Eri mindreru. = S/he is tearful.
Eri muke! = S/he is okay!
Etu mudri (10). = 4 pm/ Daytime Sun 10.
Eyi Kristiani. = They are Christians.
Eyi mairungi nya Bigi Ji si. = They eat mairungi with Big G.
Eyi muke! = They are okay!
E'yere e'yere, okuku mu re. = Slowly slowly, the tortoise went far.
E'yo azi yo! = There is no other issue/ problem!
E'yo ewaru ma talasi, ma ali 'bo. = Beside the difficult issue, I have passed already.
E'yo laza. = News.
Haleluya! = Hallelujah!
Hedeksi ni drigaza atri. = Hedex stops headaches.
Idi Amini ni andraa Lugbara agaa, Kakwa agaa. = Idi Amin was half Lugbara, half Kakwa.
Idri onyiru! = Life is good!
I'du/ Iji mupira, mi edri mupira! = Take the ball, pass the ball!
Ife (E fe) mani indi! = Give me too!
Ife (E fe) mani soda! = Give me a soda!
Ifi! = Enter/ Go in!
Ikini? = You said?
Imu dri ada-a! = Go right!
Ine! = See!
Ingu 'ba azi ku! = Hate no one!
Ini ma vutia, etu ni ifu ra. = After the night, the sun comes out.
Ini muke! = Good night!
Inisi, etu ni 'de. = At night, the sun falls/ sets.
Ipe (E pe) M7! = Vote M7!
Ise! = Pull!
Ise alu(alu)! = Grasshoppers are tasty!
Isu mi medali ceni! = Wear your (own) medal by yourself!
Isu (E su) odre 'dia ku! = Do not urinate here!
Ite ma! = Wait for me!
Itru ma! = Forgive me/ Undress me!
Itu (E tu) ongo! = Dance to the music!
Ive ra! = You got burnt/ Thank you for the food!
Iya (E ya) mi! = Shake yourself!
Izoanzi lonyi le. = Girls are like wealth.
J-Hope Band ni ongo ngo. = J-Hope Band is singing a song.
Kali aro drini aro du aziri, Arua One! = 88.7, Arua One!
Kanisa ngoa? = Where is the church?
Kini: Sende yo. = (S/he) said: There is no money.
Kirikiri! = Please!
Kome alu! = The chair is sweet!
Kome nyo-i. = The chair broke.
La skulu Ojapi-a. = (S/he) studied in Ojapi.
Le anga azi avasi! = We need to work with enthusiasm!
Le mi ati ma eri e'yo 'di indi. = Your father needs to hear this issue too.
Leta adari MUNGU vu. = True love is with GOD.
Leta mini i'da mani 'di de ma abiri. = This love you showed/ have shown me finished my hunger.
Leta nde ni. = Love wins.
Leta si, mi 'ba tru. = With love, you forgive people.
Livapulu-a, mi aci nga a'dule ku. = In Liverpool, you'll never walk alone.
Ludi ni mukati okazaru ide. = Ludi is making brown bread.
Luwero ni NRM ma e'doza. = Luwero is the beginning of NRM.
Ma a'bi la 'do. = My ancestors are resting here.
Ma ai mi ava amboru si! = I receive you with great enthusiasm!
Ma amvi, mi oja asi! = My sister, repent/ change heart!
Ma azoru! = I'm sick!
Ma dri ni ga. = My head is acheing/ paining.
Ma 'di. = I'm here.
Ma 'do. = I'm here.
Ma enga Aroi-a. = I'm (coming) from Aroi.
Ma e'yo nze a'di be? = Who am I talking with/ to?
Ma ice mi! = I missed you!
Ma iconi/ econi mi ku ku. = I cannot leave you.
Ma isu mani sende. = I found for myself money.
Ma lugba ra bongo alea. = I'm wrapping desert dates in a cloth.
Ma mi agi. = I'm your friend.
Ma mi ice! = I'm missing you!
Ma mi nda. = I'm looking for you.
Ma mu azi-a. = I'm going to work.
Ma mu cuu-a. = I'm going to the market.
Ma mu hoteli-a. = I'm going to the hotel.
Ma mu kanisa-a. = I'm going to church.
Ma mu yi we. = I'm going to swim (in water).
Ma muke! = I'm okay/ fine/ good!
Ma mundu maaku kani ayirishi nya. = I'm eating Whiteman potatoes or Irish.
Ma nga mi ice. = I will miss you.
Ma nga mu Kongo-a. = I will go to Congo.
Ma nyaka 'da. = I'm fasting.
Ma osi o'du azia, mba o'du 7 Januari, eli 1984 si. = I was born on Saturday 7th January 1984.
Ma pa ni azo! = My leg is paining!
Ma ru Luka. = My name is Luke.
Ma StarTimes TV (tava)/ tivi ne. = I'm watching StarTimes TV.
Madri 'do. = Mine is here.
Maracha ni oruleru. = Maracha is up.
Maracha Kala etu ni ifuzu ri oni dri-a. = Maracha East sits on rocks.
Maskiti ngoa? = Where is the mosque?
Mbusua ni angu ne inisi indi. = A cat can see in the night too.
Mesi ni avi 9 (Oromi) Enzoru. = Messi plays as a False 9.
Mi aa mile be! = Watch out/ Be with eyes/ Be careful!
Mi aa ngoa? = Where do you stay?
Mi aa ngoni? = How did you stay?/ Good afternoon!
Mi ai o'du driasi! = You pray everyday!
Mi ai pere Lusifa ni muzu! = Pray until Lucifer leaves!
Mi ai YESU mi asi-a! = Accept JESUS into your heart!
Mi anyu! = Switch off!
Mi avi mani ongo! = Play for me a song!
(M)i 'ba aci! = You put/ switch on the light!
Mi enga/ inga ngoa? = Where are you coming from?
Mi e'yo nze Mama Zilipa be. = You are talking to Mama Zilipa.
Mi fe ma asi ni su. = You make my heart pain.
Mi gasia nyo, ive kani 'ba ma. = You break rubbish, burn or put to rot/ decompose.
Mi ifi! = Come in!
Mi ifu/ efu ngoni? = How did you get out?/ Good morning!
Mi iji a lu mini siri azi! = Let me tell you some secret!
Mi iji katro ngungu! = Bring even if it smells!
Mi iji mani mucele osu si! = Bring me rice with beans!
Mi iku Sitani le! = You sound like Satan!
Mi imu mavu! = Come to me!
Mi iri mi tipika! = Listen to your parents!
Mi ma Namba Alu. = You are my Number One.
Mi mani a'dule. = You are mine alone.
Mi nga wu (ra). = You will cry.
(Mi) ngoni? = How (are you)?
Mi oja! = Translate/ Change/ Turn/ Flip!
Mi oja asi! = Repent (Change heart)!
Mi oja Lugbara(ti) Inglishi/ Munduti ru! = Translate Lugbara (language) into English/ Whiteman's language!
Mi olu! = (You) tell/ speak!
Mi omve tukutuku kani rakisaka! = Call a threewheeler passenger tuk-tuk or goods (rickshaw) truck!
Mi omvi (ma) mbele! = Reply (me) fast!
Mi opi dinisa! = Close the window!
Mi ru a'di-i? = What is your name?
Midri ngo? = Where is yours?
Muke! = Fine!
Mundrokole nzo nzo! = Mundrokole greens are slippery!
MUNGU eco ra. = GOD can.
MUNGU ide ayiko indi. = GOD created happiness too.
MUNGU le Lugbara ambo. = GOD loves the Lugbara in a big way.
MUNGU ni ambo! = GOD is great/ big!
MUNGU ni E'doza azini Deza. = GOD is the Beginning and End.
Museveni so pa Prezidenti ru. = M7 stood as President.
Namba oja-i ku. = The number does not change.
Nganu si 'ba roleksi ide. = Wheat flour is used to make rollex.
Ngoni? = How?/ Hello!
Nukuta Cha. = Letter C.
Nzepiri ma nze! =  Let the one who talks talk!
O'bitisi, etu ni efu. = In the morning, the sun comes out.
O'du ositaniri ayikoru! = Happy Birthday!
O'duko awuni. = Condolence message.
O'duko mini iri orobi-a 'dele MUNGU-i. = The voice you hear in a dream is probably GOD.
Ogwapiti ni Nyu Zilandi-a. = Ogwapit is in New Zealand.
Olia ni simu gba. = Olia is calling.
Omba ci. = There is anger/ sulking.
Ondu paraka si, oku yi afa drisi ide. = With sorghum stems, women make handicrafts.
Opi YESU, ru mini ma ovu ecuzaru, ewule ewule! = Lord JESUS, your name remain famous, forever!
Ori ci? Ori yo! = Is there fear? No fear!
Ori de ma. = Fear finished me/ I was afraid.
Ori ga mi ku. = The snake won't bite you.
Orindi Alataru ni amani geri i'da ni. = The Holy Spirit shows us the way/ guides us.
Orobi ni o'duko mi orindi ni. = Dreams are the voice of your spirit.
Osu ngoa? = Where are the beans?
Raga P ni aru(jo)-a. = Ragga P is in prison.
Realu/ Riyalu Madridi nde kopo azini. = Real Madrid has won another cup.
Saa na ali be. = Half past 9 o'clock.
Salima fa iza ilia si. = Salima scraped the meat using a small knife.
Sawa aziri (7) ini si. = 1 O'clock at night.
Sawa ica 'bo. = The time has already come.
Sawa si? = What time/ What is the time/ How much time?
Sawa te 'ba azi ku. = Time waits for no one.
Sayansi azini tekinoloji ni suru oja. = Science and technology changes the nation.
Sende adreni MUNGU ku, te afazi ayuzaru. = Money is not GOD, but something to use.
Sende lu kalafe/ namba ni. = Money is just a number.
Si ni avi ra, te mi aa mile be! = Teeth can get lost, but be careful!
Sindani ga(kandi)a ni tajiri nde. = A little needle defeats a tycoon/ richman (to own).
Sitani o'bi ti. = Satan tried for long (in vain).
Skulu ngoa? = Where is the school?
Stela nya onya ku. = Stella does not eat whiteants.
Su bongo grini/ ase ma wura le. = She wore a green/ like the colour of grass attire.
Terego-a, 'ba azi (ki) odro nya indi. = In Terego, some people eat rats too.
Tesla ma ru ku ndo. = Tesla's name became famous later.
URA ni Vurra-a. = URA is in Vurra.
Vikitoria ni Erika ma onyere. = Victoria is Erica's sister-in-law.
VOLU ni o'duko mini icozu asi 'bazu drinia ra ri. = Voice Of Life Uganda is the voice you can trust.
Wakabi ni e'da gba pensilu si. = Wakabi is drawing a picture with a pencil.
Westinailu Televizoni ni diza. = Westnile Television is light.
YESU dra mani. = JESUS died for me.
YESU, e ko ma aza! = JESUS, help me!
YESU ni geri. = JESUS is the way.
YESU ni Kami Yuda ni. = JESUS is the Lion of Judah.
YESU ni ma ojo/ daktari. = JESUS is my doctor.
YESU pa ma. = JESUS saved me.
Yo! = No!
Zamva 'da kalikali! = That girl is sweet!
Zukulu si, 'ba lesu ta mba. = With a calabash, milk is stored/ people store milk.


• You can search this Blog for Aiko's Lugbara Dictionary (Leta SI - Synthetic Intelligence since 2016) to get more words!

#MakeMachinesLearnLugbara: Catching SALT (Synthetic Artificial Lugbara Translation)...

Soul tea (Turning negatives into antidotes)... Chai-3...

Retrieval Augmented Generation (RAG): Because of tones and contexts that distinguish words with multiple meanings, machines may hallucinate while translating Lugbara; especially into another language... The Simplified Lugbara Alphabet which I use has 28 letters only (minus Q and X but adding 'B, 'D, 'W and 'Y) while the Advanced Lugbara Alphabet has 45 letters (7 vowels and 38 consonants)...

Do not ignore basics... Learning never ends... Train again and again and again...

"Just train for the next match..." - Vinicius Junior (2024 FIFA Best Player of the Year)

Deep researching never ends...

Mulalu [Mad] Daydream in 2001 at Makerere College School (Macos): Radio devices can transcribe what is spoken on air plus translate it (even for deaf people)... Classroom dictation since O-Level made me believe that possibility... I even wrote down lyrics from songs playing on radio. The toughest part was BBC football commentary, but tried very hard to keep up with the pace. Imagined that a machine would do it faster than me... Imagine listening to a Lugbara radio drama or song and getting real-time translation on a screen plus audio...

Word Interchange Theory (WIT) in 2005 (Inspired by 1996): Answers come from the combination of already-known words (letters and numbers)...

Big[ambo]...

Lugbara Kari [House of Lugbara]...

Where the Old [Dezaru] and New [O'diru] meet...

Lugbara Broadcast...

TRIVIA: Ayivu, Maracha, Terego and Vurra are the four main Lugbara clans in Uganda. Aringa is considered low Lugbara (though they want to stand alone as a tribe) and Koboko (Kakwaland) has place names in Lugbarati especially near Lugbaraland. Some Madi Okollo dialects are mutually intelligible with Lugbara, a language whose speakers are believed to have broken away from the Madi near Juba in South Sudan after migrating from Nigeria. The Madi called them "Lugba [Desert dates] ni". Lugbara were hired to cut sugarcanes in Masindi, Lugazi (Mukono), Kakira (Jinja), etc and many settled in those areas...

There are nine Lugbara clans in DR Congo...

In South Sudan, Lugbara extend as Zande...

Arua is at the Heart of West Nile (and the ancient Lado Kingdom)...

Shazam!

Speech-To-Text (STT)...

Automatic Speech Recognition (ASR) is used in Twitter (X) Spaces, Google Meet, etc...

Model Context Protocol (MCP)...

Synthetic Lugbara-Processing (SLP) Research/ Lugbara Training Library/ Deep Learning Indaba (Symposium) ARUA... From Google Translate to Sunbird AI (Ugandan project), Meta AI, Sigma.AI, etc, the possibilities for Lugbara AI are limitless...

Ojapi (Bypassing the Language Barrier): Transcribe, translate, chat...

Informative Synthetic Encoder (ISE) - No. 031224, is a database collection of parallel Lugbara-to-English phrases pulled through audio-textual translation (ATT). The work of ISE is to input data from audio or text documents, pull translations, spot inconsistencies and errors (by verifying entries), understand plus generate new insightful parallels. It stores the translations made...

You do not have to be a carpenter to use a hammer, neither do you have to be technical like a coder, computer engineer nor data scientist to train AI...

Artificial Intelligence Knowledge Organiser...

(Creative Commons) AikoGraphics (2003-Now)

Company Development

Phases of Organisational Development: (from a Uganda Arts and Media Academy organised (Norwegian) Tina Davis ‘Documentary’ workshop in April 2008)

Leadership: Founder has Strong Vision, Charismatic, Is the Unifying Force, Identity of the Entity

Organisation: Informal, Improvisational, No or Little Structure: Operates like a Family, Closeness/ Warmth, Motivated Staff, Trust is High
Growth: Chaotic, Rapid, Dependency, Need for Specialisation

Crisis: DECISION MAKING – Ineffective, Ad Hoc, Informal, Not Consistent, Little Accountability; LEADERSHIP – No Structure, One Person or Small Informal Group, Loss of Faith in Leader, Management Clashes/ Conflicts, Frustration

Rational Phase Management:
Structures, Departments, Organograms, Formal
Formal Rules and Procedures: Memos for Communication … Identity is an Organisation known by Logo

FUNCTIONS: Differentiated, Technical, Standardized, Rational
Rigid Process: Bureaucracy, Low Motivation, Poor Communication, Management & Worries, Conflict, Vision not shared, Low Productivity, Number and not Person is important

INTEGRATED PHASE” Facilitative, Respectful, Interactive, Federal Integration of Units, Self-determination, Independence
LEADERSHIP: All encompassing, Accommodation, Need for Focus
ORGANISATION: Competitiveness, Open Organisation, Boundaries, Need for a focused and dynamic Way

ASSOCIATION PHASE: Association of Organisations, Focus on Value Creation, Macro Social Science; Open Boundaries to other Organisations a Formation of Networking Organisations, Interdependence; Usually works at first but may be eaten from the Inside, Conflicts; Individual Identity fades, If the Borders are not opened then the Central Organisation becomes the Leader, May be created to control others, May not be beneficial to Member Organisations

Friday

Pitchou’s Angle

On Wednesday 9 July 2008, the Executive Producer of the WeitWinkel (German for ‘Wide Angle’) Film Production Company - Rwandese-Congolese Pitchou Kamara K. - gave me a few tips for professional video, film and TV production during the first ever (though poorly attended on Day 3) Video-Art Exhibition at the new UGCS on Mackinnon Road. Discussions were supposed to be done by Ugandan Art icon Xenson (Stephen Ssenkaaba) borrowing a leaf from 40YEARSVIDEOART.DE – PART 1, a 2006 Digital Heritage: Exhibition of Video Art in Germany from 1963 to the Present, but he cancelled them. The first six videos were close up shorts of one sitted woman’s pants and inner thighs, then breasts moving, legs and socks, black-sleeved arm bending, eyes shutting & closing and finally the mouth. The three ladies who attended [UGCS Director Wagner was travelling somewhere, a stunningly beautiful OG of mine from Macos and an unnamed artist] walked out early probably because of the theme. The funniest video or us was a guy shouting “Hallo!” non stop on top of a hill for several minutes while coughing and calling out in a progressively hoarse voice.

Advertising is always great if actions are involved. I’m not trying to brag but during the 2001 Annual Inter-House Quiz at Macos while I was just new in Senior Five, a Senior Six hostel-mate who had read my journals and notebooks forced me to be one of the three representatives besides another classmate of his and a black, beautiful Middle-School chick. WEM, a Kenyan American for real (whom I failed to convince that I wanted to bring about an Art Revolution) reasoned that when it came to sports and music, I would bail out Simba House. The girl was back up for novels and feminine stuff while the other boy was mathematically & politically sound. So we were basically covered. I must confess that in the barrage of questions, the two I regret most were failing a Pythagoras Theorem number where after calculating without consulting my team-mates, I mentioned a number that was wrong by only one zero I did not add at the end of the digit. The more shameful though was saying Charlie Lubega [instead of Toni ? Mackinnon] had won the World Rally Championship. Nevertheless, when I was told to advertise a new insecticide called ‘Bon Bon’ in one minute, I think I made WEM proud of himself for choosing me. When I got the mic, the first reference that came to my mind was the TV adverts I used to watch. Many of them had songs. So I composed a ‘well-rhymed’ (as WEM told his classmates including Michael Ross of the ‘Signorita’ fame) rap song on the spot, “Bon Bon is the insecticide, Bon Bon is the insecticide. If you use it, you will kill all the insects in your house.” I heard a hissing sound from the audience and followed up my hit with a spraying hiss and movement from front, back, side to side, up to down low. I got the maximum 5 points from my SMACK Old Boy called from Makerere University to chair the Quiz…the Next Contestant Karen Hashya (Funny name some pronounced as ‘Hasasha’) whom the school knew as a talented songstress also tried to sing her advertisement but I beat her by 1 point. Other guys who were below 4 points had different ideas I cannot remember. It was a plus for me which I followed up by perfectly describing the word ‘pan’ (written on a chit) with only actions and ‘No Words’ for my two teammates to decipher. (I also took part in the Best Play later on during that Inter-House Competition season which my house Simba clinched overall) After the quiz where we were runners-up out of six houses, hostelmates in other houses wanted me to re-sing the tune for them. Unfortunately the following year, I never took part in any Music Production nor sung during Sunday Service except during our Farewell Mass because I felt contented with what I had done in Senior Five. But anyway, I knew that I was still a ‘shirt’ as Victor Semugooma called me for giving up on repeating these feats in ‘02; we try hard to be what we ain’t, you know. Life is just ‘kiwani’, even the stars ain’t all that. We just compromise because they do one offs maybe many times. Advertising is all about sugar-coats, covering up the truth through marvellous actions.

PKK’s Tips on Videos & Art:
“Put some books on a table. Shine 111 Watts of light on them through a transparent filter and take a photo. It will be the Most Beautiful you have ever seen…”
“A (music) video should have three major colours. Most American videos have blue, red and black. If you watch CNN, you will discover that the main colour is red…”
“Ugandan TV is boring because cameramen do not write before they shoot.”
“You can edit a video in Adobe Photoshop by first creating an alpha channel…”
“What are the three things to consider while making a TV commercial? First, know the product you are advertising; secondly, ascertain its competition in the market and finally; understand the qualities of your product that make it more desirable than the others.”
“If you can make a product attractive in a TV commercial without adding sound, then you have done a good job…”
According to IAA (International Advertising Association), “Advertising only makes people buy things they do not need, but besides, they want.” What makes them want these things? Find below examples of the Best TV Commercials I’ve marveled at personally:
1. “If you want to make it to the NBA,” [A guy runs from the free throw line, tries to slam dunk but misses the hoop, hits the rim hard with his basketball and comes down tumbling. TV view shows his behind landing on the camera lens while yelling in distress, ‘Urrrrhhhh!’ Very funny, indeed!] “Practice! If you want a refreshing drink, ‘Obey your Thirst! Sprite® Image is nothing, Thirst is everything’.”

2. A photocopier jerks out papers and even jumps away when a human approaches with other brands of paper that are not Rotatrim ®

3. The voice-over of a man narrates what everyone (His father, mother & teacher) wanted him to become. On the screen, we see a car driving by on a dusty road and the man ends by saying, “…so here I am, Mitsubishi & Pajero™, enjoy yourself!”

4. A Mercedes Benz clip in which a (soulful) father and (funky) son fight to play the music they fancy. The father finally decides to drive at a speed that couldn’t allow his son to touch the player. From another Mercedes advertisement, “Nothing can make a driver more faithful to his car than a car that is faithful to its driver.”

5. A Telecom Advertisement from Tanzania about a father who phones his son and gets mesmerized by the musical feedback instead of the usual boring ring-ring. The boy who was going to the opposite side of his room picks the call and greets “Hello!” before hanging up since no one responded. The elderly father redials and shakes with the phone held high in his left hand while his brother dances on the floor like a gymnast …“Tigo, Express Yourself!”

6. In the 90s, Kenya was known for producing the finest adverts in East Africa…You had the Kiwi, Ribena, Hedex, Dettol, Omo, Geisha and Unilever franchises but the Blue Band experience of a Primary School pupil spreading margarine on bread under his class-desk does it for me in the new Millennium. “Who can tell me what condensation is? Jeremy!” He got up pretending to be innocent and answered correctly after clearing his throat. The teacher smiled and his classmates looked on with approving glances.

7. “You’re the Most Beautiful Girl I’ve ever seen…” One dude made his girlfriend jealous when he admired another lady who was passing behind her until she used Fair & Lovely™ skin lotion and he just couldn’t deny the same compliment for her. This time though, he said it humorously alluding to the previous disheartening experience. There was a mirror behind her so when she looked to see if it was that other girl again, she saw herself instead. Wow!

8. “Mummy, he’s done it again.” A young girl shouted on the beach after her brother had literally re-sucked himself into a soda bottle through a straw. It’s impossible but vividly illustrates the irresistible sweetness of the PEPSI® drink that makes kids suck beyond the last drop until the sound from sucking an empty bottom is heard.

9. A Clay Animation in which fast-paced Thierry Henry wearing Reebok™ or Nike™ sneakers runs around a boxer in a fighting ring and makes him collapse (through a whirlwind knockout).

10. A fierce bull runs away from a Toyota™ automobile. The car maker’s logo actually has an arc like the horns of a bull extending from a vertical oval within the outline.

11. “In 1994, I missed a penalty.” (Pony-tailed Roberto Baggio holds his head while kneeling after chipping Italy’s final penalty over goalkeeper Tafferel’s crossbar in the World Cup Final shootout to decide the 0-0 draw with Brazil who won 3-2). “Four years later, I had a chance to redeem myself.” (This time it was a penalty in a European qualifier to decide whether Italy would go through to the 1998 World Cup competition in France. Some fans covered their eyes but the talented Italian legend did not disappoint. My 4th Sister-Tina-actually loves this guy (He lighted up USA ’94 for her) and personally, I think he is the Most Idolized Azzuri I have ever watched besides maybe Dino Zoff, Zola, Del Piero & Totti). Baggio walked away majestically with the whole nation following him. Johnie Walker™: “Success is not a journey; it’s a destination…” The World Cup ’94 Commercials of players kicking the ball from continent to continent and 2002 Galaxy of Stars fantasy (Henry, Ronaldinho, Figo, Zidane, Edgar Davids, Ronaldo, Beckham, Roberto Carlos) were also creative.

12. The Smirnoff Ice ‘Welcome to my Home’ advertisement won my 2005 AikoGraphics Commercial of the Year laureate…A carefree and fur-coated male (probably an Eskimo) takes viewers on a tour of his organized crib and ends in his icy backyard after pulling out a bottle of Smirnoff from a refrigerator. Why would you need one in these already icy conditions? Reinforced Ice, I guess! In 2003, I had fallen in love with everything icy so this was juicy stuff…Aiko in Wonderland, you know!

13. The 2001-2 “It’s My Life” Sports Highlights Feature (Background song by Bon Jovi) on SuperSport plus the “What’s in a Name? Fabregas ... Wenger” Premiership Advertisement ... Another good English League Commercial is, “Every civilization has found a way to record the passage of time. Today, we discover another ...”

Here are good Radio Ads I’ve also enjoyed:
1. The humorous Coca-Cola ® “Let Me See You ‘Brrrr!’ (Remix)” of the “Burrn”
song by Blu*3 and Navio, “It’s an honor to introduce to you, the Brrrr!
on the Coke side of life”
2. The uganda telecom “Boyfi” advert
3. The utl ‘Mango™’ rap, “My cellular phone is all brand new…”
4. CLUB ® Beer for people who think different: “What was the Best Thing before
sliced bread?”
5. “I’m going to call my brother.” a voice actor fades away as if at a distance
from the friend with whom he had just had a dialogue about MTN or utl,
sorry
I can’t remember which company.

Wednesday

Pastor Norman Quotes

Every Sunday between 9:30 and 10:00 (previously 10:30 and 11) AM on Voice of Life FM (Arua), Pastor Norman Acidribo (born 18th February 1968) from Arua Full Gospel Church at the Northeastern Foot of Arua Hill teaches during the Sunday Half Hour Gospel Show. You can call him on the studio-line, but for privacy, dial 0772-355305; GOD bless! Below are some of his Quotes:

(Prayer:) The many Things YOU do not want us to do today, let us not do them... I'm a Vessel YOU can use... Without YOU, I wouldn't speak YOUR Word... LORD GOD!
We are grateful to GOD that we are alive... Many have ceased to be...

Let everything that has Breath praise GOD, regardless of your Religion... Colour... Status...

I usually like the King James Version...

Our Struggle is not against Flesh and Blood... It's against Authorities, not our Councils in Arua but dark Forces in the heavenly Realms...

Your Faith must always be taken up above all the other Armour... Why Shield of Faith?... This Shield Paul was talking of was almost 2-3 Feet high and curved in to protect the Body... Those Days there were no inter-continental ballistic Missiles, B52... RPG, Bazooka... They had Projectiles... He parallels it to the flaming Arrows of Satan. Inter-continental Missiles Satan has, Chemical Weapons Satan has... Equally we need Protection and this Protection Paul says is our Faith... That's why the Bible says, without Faith, noone can see GOD... Satan wants to destroy you...

Take up the Shield of Faith so that you can extinguish the flaming Arrows of Satan before they can hit your Salvation... Truth... Righteousness... Preparedness...

In Luke, when Jesus was walking on the Sea. The Apostles didn't know... Peter said: Can I come to you? Command me to come to you... Peter began going to JESUS Christ... But Time came when the Waves rose against Peter so hard and he became afraid... He began to sink...

Satan's Arrows come in form of Fear, Worry... Fear comes in your Emotions: What am I going to eat, how are my children going to School... That is why Christians have resorted to go to Shrines of Witchdoctors, Warlocks. Where is your Faith?

The Person, instead of glorifying GOD in Marriage decides to take a Shortcut especially my Sisters when am talking to my Friends the Muslims. They say they were Catholics and married a Muslim... Now they are denying Christ that JESUS is not GOD. What Faith was that?

Don't confess negatively upon your Family, upon your Clan... I come from the Yole Clan... Someone out there is saying: What good can come from the Yole Clan?

Somebody is being lied to now that you cannot be healed...

Build up your Faith, the Devil is coming with an Arrow...

If I go to Saudi Arabia and there is only a Catholic Church, I will go there...

Let's keep the Unity of Faith... Sometimes we become the Victims of our Faith because we want to stand alone... If you are a Pentecostal and there is only an Anglican Church, you can find a Brother to fellowship with. You can hear the Word of GOD. Are you stronger than Satan, I'm not... But HE who is in me is stronger than the World...

(Sunday 9th May 2020) Today, there's a lot of competition in the Church. Why? We don't understand the Grace... Operate according to the Grace given unto you... There are some people here who have began ministries, they have not gone to Bible College but their churches are full... Now for me, the Grace given to me to shepherd people here at Arua Full Gospel is not the same given to my dear sister in Ediofe... If you are a singer, sing... I've visited three or four places where people are flocking and the majority are even Muslims coming and some get born again. Why don't we celebrate and say: GOD's grace has worked out but we begin to tear each other: Wo wo wo wo, that one is a false prophet, cult. By the way, the same measure you measure is the same measure that will be measured unto you...

(Sunday 20th March 2022) We give GOD glory that we are alive... Friends, you may be poor (lacking something this day: food, medicine, school fees, all these things press on us) but in all this, think about one thing: Why am I alive? Give thanks to GOD... No man has authority beyond GOD... GOD has spoken to us through the Bible, but Culture is also speaking... Cultural expectations are in variety... In other cultures, women are upholded (upheld). In Asia, women pay dowry but here - Lugbara, Madi, Alur, men pay dowry and all that... What was GOD's design? HE created male and female... Who are you? Thank GOD I grew up as a boy to a man, but am seeing my sisters not enjoying. Why? HE created them in HIS own image, the same status... No one is undervalued... Cultural expectations come according to where we belong... In the Orient, women pay dowry but in Arua, Nebbi, Pakwach, Madi, Adjumani, Koboko, a man has to pay and then owns a woman. When it comes to inheritance, boys are given their portions but the ladies are not given... When I was still a young boy, it was only all the boy children of my grandfather who were allotted land; my aunts were never given land. Why? Cultural expectation; the women are made lower... In the books of other faiths: Two women are equal to one man; a woman is half of a man, hehehe! I usually say: Eh, then how does this work out? In the perspective of Genesis 1:27, GOD created man in HIS own image; male and female... When people undermine you, they call you poor, what what, I mean you should encourage yourself: I'm not poor, am in the image of GOD; GOD is not poor. You might be in a state of lack, but you are not poor. View yourself in the image of GOD... Our challenges and complications come because of our attitude; we take the word of people more than the Word of GOD... Today, women feel very inferior... They should look at the Word of GOD... What was the context in the original plan? Many families have broken because of that also... Avuti [Sacrifice for a corpse] and jotile [Door-opening fee required from in-laws during burial] in Lugbara culture are not biblical...

[Sunday 2nd October 2022:] 30 minutes after my confirmation (at Mvara Senior), I was smoking a long cigarette we used to call omboko... I'm a follower of JESUS... My mother was free, I would tell her am going to church, but end up at the Roman Catholic Christ the King, then I line up to eat sweet Holy Communion bread... It's not about your denomination, it's about JESUS. Why are we quarrelling? I was a bangi smoker/ mairungi chewer for two years but when I joined (Armed) Forces, I was afraid that I'd be arrested and sent to prison, so I stopped... M7 taught me how to shoot a gun but if he declared Uganda a Christian nation, I'd carry a bigger gun... Muslim humour: Can GOD die? No! Did JESUS die? No! So, is JESUS GOD? No! Hahaha... Even if you're a prostitute, surrender your life! Noone should abuse you; I know what you're going through... 

[Sunday 7th May 2023:] Faith is about JESUS... If it's religion, I could have been anywhere. I grew up near the Hindu Temple next to Arua Public Primary and when I was a small boy, we would eat the bananas they dedicated to their gods, heehee! I knew it as food they gave when they came out... Muhammad got some things from The Bible... Muslims believe JESUS will come back...

[Sunday 2nd July 2023:] I do not take it for granted when people say Uganda is the Pearl of Africa... It's the only jewel formed by a living organism... A grain of sand falls into an oyster which secretes a juice that hardens around the sand and forms a pearl sold at a high price... The longer the pearl stays in the oyster, the bigger it is... You should know the value of the Church; the one who started the Church paid a great price... People fear that if you become a theologian, you will become poor. The Church is very glorious, very rich... The one whom the Church came from is GOD... GOD owns everything... The first person who knocked at my door this morning is a Muslim; she told me: I just want to believe in JESUS Christ... It's not Norman's Church, Church of Uganda, Full Gospel, etc... It's the Church of Christ... The lack of money does not mean you are poor...

[Sunday 9th July 2023:] Are you fruitful as a child of GOD? The number (of fruits) and quality matters... A branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in JESUS... There are almost nine entities in the fruit of the Spirit... Let us offer the sacrifice of praise to GOD continually... The fruit of our lips... There are many nations in Arua; I see the Somalis here (running petrol stations), Chinese, Indians, Arabs... Sometimes, I get angry when Christians preach to fellow Christians only, even if some are nominal... Every Somali is born a Muslim... The Somalis are brought near here, why can't I reach them? Let's catch fresh fish... Being an usher is the greeting ministry; welcome new people with a smile... People saw me cutting grass outside the Church and said: Pastor is also mowing grass... I know the mechanism, I have the talent to mow grass. Why can't I do it?

[Sunday 18th July 2023:] Thank YOU for life and the oxygen we breathe every day... Other people pay for manufactured oxygen but ours is free... Guide the President as he addresses insecurity in the country! Confuse every person planning war against this nation... Deliver patients from the torment of the Enemy... People term anointing for very many things that are not... In the Bible (Old Testament), there was a special anointing oil made using various special mixtures. For us in the New Testament, we believe we are anointed by the LORD through the Holy Spirit... Allow the anointing to work out what GOD wants to accomplish... I was battling, thinking: Should I desert the Forces? I would still preach, my mentor was an officer... I was also good at business... Not that when the LORD anoints you, people will fall down... I've seen people pushing children of GOD down... Why exert force? Anointing can even be for you to clean the toilet of the Church; that's where you will find your breakthrough... You will not be running around: Pray for me, pray for me!

[Sunday 23rd July 2023:] The Lugbara do not go for burial to mourn but mock: Look, he did not build a house here! They go to see the road to your place, your people, etc. After burial, they want to return and gossip...





(CC) YESU Magazine

Build Giant Solar Stations

INSTEAD of building dams yet water levels are decreasing and in the end destroying our beautiful waterfalls, the Government should experiment with giant solar panels. Uganda lies astride the equator so the sun’s energy is abundant for exploitation.

Edward Aikobua,
Mukono
(Published in Sunday Vision, 22 January 2006)

Isn’t Kel’s a true musical Genius?

I’m not the Hugest Fan of his but (among all the international musical artistes I know), only Robert Kelly stands out as the one entertainer with an unbelievable midas touch. Maybe it’s because he did the soundtrack for my Childhood Icon Michael Jordan’s 1995 ‘Space Jam’ movie but every song, duet or remix he works on is a hit.
[My cousin Edwin Paratra probably influenced me to write this because of the TP2.com album he had, but the only song by Kel’s I did not like for a moment while growing up (though seemingly Gospel) was “Storm is Over”, because of the Video. The angelic choirs made my spirit tingle a bit since I couldn’t get over some of my hurdles in life with or without their help.]
Kel’s actually seems to me a naturalized Man of the World with a doze of Godly reverence in him.

Money Can Buy Anything

Whoever said ‘money can’t buy love’ must have been a false prophet with minimal tact in romantic logistics. It’s not about how much but how. Are you pursuing someone? Use your tact and best wit backed by money and see whether they won’t fall for you under the weight of your investment versatility. Jesus said that we should use our money to win friends. From love to success, life to freedom, GOD’s salvation (hmm!) to immortality/ eternal bliss, there’s nothing money can’t buy. I’m not being blasphemous but Jesus, the LORD of All told a young rich man that if he wanted to inherit the kingdom of Heaven, he should go and sell all he has, give the money to the poor and then follow Christ. Paying tithe (10% of your income) to the church bank will make you richer. I have evidence; an extra 0 figure or more on the amount you offered.
Chelsea Football Club’s winning combination started with Benjamins or let me quip and say ‘Romans’ from Russia. No Americans here. A rich oil tycoon named Roman bought the club which had last won the English League once and in 1955, paid off all their debts, bought high profile players (like Didier Drogba), increased their salaries, hired the services of an accomplished coach (Mourinho) and three years or two seasons later, he had literally bought success. Abramovic rebuilt the Roman Empire in two seasons and one day. During the 2005 Barclaycard Premiership, Chelsea defeated Manchester United home (1-0) and away (1-3, the unforgettable score that clinched the trophy). On their way to the Carling Cup championship, Chelsea also out-muscled the Red Devils, drawing 1-1 at the Bridge and winning 1-2 in the return leg.
Do you still disagree? Okay, then Eminem has ‘got the money to have you killed by somebody who has nothing.” Think about it: A price can be put on your life. Ask Jesus (No fun intended). Why are beautiful women bought? I mean, they may not love the man but become the wife. Was he looking for their love or just the position?
If you want me to give you an ‘encore’ of this topic, there might be a ‘Parental Advisory’ warning for explicit content.
Farewell Jose
[This letter was written immediately after his cruel departure but published no where]
“I am a die-hard Arsenal fan but will always cherish Jose Mourinho. When Thierry left, I froze momentarily but also looked at the bright side; Henry will be able to compete favourably for the FIFA Player of the Year Award and the remaining Gunners can distribute goals among themselves. When Mourinho left though, I felt the Premiership lost a different treasure. The Special One brought effective competition to the Premiership, a perfect ‘Blue Revolution’ (2005-7). Why couldn’t other teams also win the Premiership after Man Utd, Blackburn, United again and then us? Everton is always sexy but gets optimum seasonal blues, the Almighty Kops are somehow jinxed, Newcastle pretended in 2001-2 and West Ham do not hammer hard enough. Chelsea certainly struggled in the fantastic Zola-Poyet-Guillit-Wise-Hasselbaink eras but Abramovic’s arrival blinded us to believe that ‘more money means more triumph’. [Romanian striker Gustavo Poyet once exclaimed that with only one free kick, Italian teammate Gianfranco Zola could score two goals.] I’m not downgrading the great talent of Terry and Company or Abramovic’s riches but Mour’ was the charismatic genius who attracted more big name success to Chelsea: 5 trophies in 3 years and no home loss at Stamford Bridge is just awesome (Mourinho-some). As they say in Portuguese (or Spanish, I don’t know), ‘Adious, Signori!’.”

Monday

Government’s Gift to Exporters

Private Sector Foundation Uganda (PSFU) has since June 2005 been implementing the Second Private Sector Competitiveness Project (PSCP II). This is a 5 year World Bank – Government of Uganda project aimed at creating sustainable conditions for enterprise creation and growth. Under its three components – Developing infrastructure and financial services; Enhancing enterprise competitiveness; and Improving the business environment – the project’s various innovative activities are intended to increase value addition, support linkages between enterprises and improve skills for MSMEs. To make this happen, PSFU is working together with Uganda Investment Authority, Uganda Law Reform, Uganda Registration Services Bureau, Uganda National Bureau of Standards, and Ministry of Lands and Urban Development.
“A powerful, distinctive, and appealing national brand in case of the country or company brand, is one of the most valuable gift a government can give to its exporters. Today, branded exports are one of the most potent ways of building and sustaining company and subsequently national image.” The Business Branding Linkages (BBL) Programme is aimed at capturing more value from profit margins associated with branding and marketing.
The expected outcome is that our products will be differentiated from those of our competitors thus making it more difficult for them to compete for our customers. We expect to attract a higher price for our products. This will enable us to communicate with our products using consistent messages and build a positive image for our businesses and our nation.
How is the PSFU going to support this initiative? The program will identify sectors/ firms in the country suitable for branding or with potential to attract incremental benefits as a result of branding and assist them on a cost share basis by: (i) Hiring branding consultants to assist the firm/ sector undertake market analysis in international and regional markets and identify products, market segments where Ugandan producers could successfully penetrate. (ii) Developing branding strategies or campaign. (iii) Working with identified firms/ sectors to the creation of new brands/ sub brands and improve the quality and efficiency along the value chain in order for them to meet the required quality and quantity requirements. (iv) Providing support in respect of the brand related costs arising out of the recommended branding strategy i.e. advertising, marketing campaigns, design of materials/ packaging and creation of branding stories.
Eligibility is based on whether the applicant is privately-owned and is not fully or partially owned by Government; The applicant is carrying out business in the MSME sector with a potential for export to regional or international markets in any category apart from production of weapons, alcoholic beverages, tobacco and gambling; Companies are in compliance with tax and requirements; Cost share basis grants are up to a maximum of USD 100,000

© PSFU Exporters & Importers Directory 2008

The PSFU (Private Sector Foundation Uganda) & MTN Trade Facilitation Exhibition on Friday 27 June 2008 was, I must confess, an illustrious success though I came in late from Kampala Town around noon. With stalls on almost one half plus on the long ends of the North Western Exhibition Hall at Lugogo Show Grounds, a large area was set aside for listeners to sit and you could see that the exhibition was well attended. A minister from Rwanda was speaking when I made my entrance. An apology was made by the MC about the absence of one of the panelists who had to go to the airport earlier than scheduled for checking before a voyage out of the country that evening. I expected PSFU chairman James Mulwana to be there, but didn’t see him. Could he have been the one mentioned?

Anyway, after the minister, Richard Kamajugo a URA Commissioner [AC – Trade] on behalf of Allen Kagina started by conveying the Commissioner General’s remarks; personally I think she’s always brilliant and considerate to tax payers, you know, the aura of motherly love makes her great. I do not know much about her white predecessor but call Kagina the “Customs Mama”. Please don’t tell her daughter Mitchel that Aiko said so…Her words conveyed by Commissioner Kamajugo were worth writing home about, “Today, because of the technology, reengineering and a common East African customs understanding, consignments can be cleared within 24 hours unlike in the past which took many days... Customs is the branch of URA that handles exports and imports.”

Lunch (a package of chicken, salt, sausage, sumbi, tomato sauce, and irish) plus a drink were served to the tired listeners to woo them back from the stalls to hear more because the commissioner was not done yet. What else would you expect other than feeding all those present when these guys had made a lot of money from the sponsors and exhibitors? Richard’s subsequent presentation was about URA’s role in the export business. (For more details about his presentation, I would suggest that you check out URA’s website @ www.ugrevenue.com) All I could gather because of food in my mouth (I wasn’t prepared to write) was that some taxes had been waivered. The Most Interesting was the waiver of income tax on new agro-processing businesses 30 Kilometres outside Kampala in the new financial year which was just four days away on Tuesday. There was also a waiver on trucks that carry loads above 3.5 MT (Metric Tonnes) so buying such a truck in the new FY would be cheaper. The commissioner Richard Kamajugo even advised businessmen to replace their family saloon cars with an export truck if they so wished… Richard also mentioned the usual waivers of tax on exports such as hides and skins [yet in the past, no body was allowed to export them]. “Uganda gets her foreign exchange from exports. So without large amounts of foreign exchange, we cannot trade for imports with the foreigners. URA has come in to facilitate and promote exports…”

This was more of an export promotion exhibition. UCIFA Chairman Omar Kassim was also one of the speakers and said “UCIFA is always open (for exporters and importers)”. Sponsors (who were honored after the Rwandese minister’s speech) plus Advertisers included (in no distinguished order) PSFU, Barclays, SkyNet, uganda telecom; MTN, UIA (Uganda Investment Authority) alongside UEPB (Uganda Export Promotion Board); Stanbic Bank; Nine international embassies like Holland, UK, et cetera; South African Airways, UCIFA (Sitting at the stall was board member Lino Cries Icila and the Secretary to UCIFA’s Chairman)…Secretary General Jad Johnsons Tabule who is also the director of Freight Kargo Masters was in the crowd and so was Assistant Chairman Lawrence Ayebare who listened to the presenters; CMA (Capital Markets Authority); dfcu Bank (offering Land Loans between 5 and 75 Million UgX and other services); UPS & Daks Couriers; UFFA (Uganda Freight Forwarders Association) the second Clearing and Forwarding Association in Uganda; Tourism Uganda, UAP Insurance Company and other exhibitors not mentioned; Citi Bank Group put up their banner but were not present…

Below is the spirit of UCIFA’s role in the import and export business. As the foremost umbrella body of clearing and forwarding firms in Uganda, UCIFA is an intermediary between customs and importers or exporters. They carry out the necessary customs documentation and lodgments of entries. The body advises clients on customs requirements, laws, regulations and procedures. UCIFA updates clients on changes that occur from time to time. It facilitates import and export operations in the most efficient and cost effective manner. Also, it advises on the mode of transport & the facilities in transportation; liaises with Uganda Revenue Authority and other stakeholders in the facilitation of import and export business thus facilitating trade and tax collection.

Onion Boy

People will hear the systems thump when you roll in life. The O.B. is not just your Old Boy but freakingly your Onion Boy (the O-Boy), a Ladies Man, Family Man and Best Friend. He’s back in the flesh feeling so blessed. He loves thick, cute, fleshy and swollen monocotyledons that can cause a crush and titillate his eyes. He wants to touch, hold and feel them. “I love these bulbs and their onion juice. But never let onions make you visually impaired!” warns your friendly neighbourhood Onion Boy…

Are you a Pimp?
How many women does a man really need? Lidz in the “Southside” video tells Lloyd to “allow only three great women in his life.” (Did he mean mum, sister and girlfriend or just three lovers?) What will he do with all the three? How much time will he need to dedicate to satisfy each one of them? Okay, forget the time. The issue is how you get the three! Do you use Shakespeare’s lines or read volumes of poetry books? I hear poetry turns women on. Hahaha! Hogwash…How many women did the great poets have? Talk about money and almost any daughter of Eve can shake her ‘glorious maximus’ for you. Ask Akon after he performs “Bonanza [Belly Dancer]” in a concert near your town [how they shake it]! Don’t be shy. (Maybe he will come back to Kampala for you, let’s wait and keep on calling.)
Another idea is the wisdom of men. Can fools really face up to the challenge? King Solomon of Israel was truly the Wisest Pimp in human history: 700 wives and 700 concubines must be a Guinness Book of Records Milestone somewhere. Ignore guys who claim to have slept with 432 bitches or more. I am talking about real wives, not bitches. So does that mean, we bachelors looking for only one partner are silly and unwise? Maybe Poetry doesn’t work.
The Quran allows men to marry up to four wives and when you get to heaven (Jana), you will have more female companions (houri) with big beautiful eyes. The Bahai Holy Writings prescribe not more than two.” If you are contented with only one among the maidservants of GOD, both you and she will live in tranquility”. That is also the Christian teaching spread by Saint Paul (in the epistles to Christ’s early church). If you didn’t know, GOD was not happy with Solomon’s 1400 companions; too much lust (according to the Mormon Bible). “I don’t know what you heard about me”. I’m broke…

[Original article written in 2005 (Bracketed words added in 2008)]

Mission: Impossible UG…

“WHEN we go to court, I’ll be winning the case…” raps Navio in Klear Kut’s rhythmic breakthrough collaboration with songstress Juliana Kanyomozi of the IJ Fame (in the hit-song “All I Wanna Know”). Although produced in 2000, this bouncy party song actually won a deserved PAM Award (Pearl of Africa Music Awards started in 2003, you can call them Ugandan ‘Pammys’ like the US ‘Grammys’). It seems that even in the studio Klear Kut will be winning the battle.
KK has a clear cutting edge in quality. Some good challengers, though solo artistes, ever since Ugandan Hiphop started growing fast in the first decade of this millennium are the free-rhyming Lyrical G, plus the very talented, knowledgeable, patriotic and socially conscious GNL (He'll kick it beyond Hot 100 FM to TV; GNL’s got what it takes to be the Greatest. He is the first signed Ugandan rapper. Platinum Entertainment signed up his record label Baboon Forest Entertainment Limited. Klear Kut works with him; Myth actually confessed that “GNL is the illest (Most Awesome) Ugandan rapper today”. He dresses hiphop, always walks with a swagger and never lacks poetry in his mind. GNL even won the Impala Award for Poetry in the whole of Africa. But what does GNL mean? Well, according to Aztec Wisdom, “At the highest level of self expression, you achieve [GNL] Greatness of No Limit”).
Ragga Dee is originally a ragga artist but he’s got some very hot crowd-moving rhyming skills you can categorise as hiphop. Rhythm and Blues guitarist Maurice Kirya is so real like hip-hop despite playing what the Mugwere - Munyoro lad describes as Fusion Music. I have loved his beats ever since I first heard him play and think his talent is truly phenomenal. There is also a free flowing Rapper who makes Lusogo sound beautiful, Babaluku is cool, Enygma is a very enigmatic Word-smith, Keko's Perception makes sense, Rocky Giant rocks, Lady Slyke is amazing, Sizza Dictionary flows, AK47 is Ragga Talent, Raba Daba tomusobola, Young Zee can speak, King Arthur is out of this world and Atlas will take you on a trip...
Klear Kut’s Navio, Mith (the Fattest - He’s “not a category but a catalogue…”) and the short guys Aba & Missing Link (Wasn't that JB back then?) sound so American you would be excused to think that they are gang-bangers. Of course this gang is dangerous in a lyrical sense, try them, you'll get hurt. Meanwhile, the Fifth element Papito has something for the European audience or Franco-phone speakers around the world with his French vibes. He can also spit Swahili and so he is Microsoft Certified for Windows 2005. Their albums are pieces of magic. No wonder MTV Base came to East Africa, that's Worldwide Recognition! Next achievement for the franchise: Immortality, I guess.