United Gombololas (UG)

Thomas (aka Brown) & Grey...

United Gombololas (UG) is a joke series compiled by Aiko (Cartoonist) to make you giggle or smile. It contains some of the funniest, ribcracking, two-sentence ideas I have heard, seen or thought in the Pearl of Africa, accompanied with the tune entitled "Falling" by Allan Toniks ft. Fille. Thomas who runs the A4 Coffee (Beverages) shop at 3rd World Mall in Awadifo Subcounty (Arua) gets hitched forever in Twenty21 to Grey who sells textiles next door...

Why do you always go to church? To eat JESUS bread, drink HIS wine and ask GOD for food.

Which European country is a Black person? Monte-negro.

Why was Elijah taken to Heaven? Because Queen Jezebel wanted to play him like Naboth.

What advice would you give the youth in your former school? Just be yourself, but wear deodorant!

Which banknote reminds you of Leila Chandiru (singer)? Embeleke [50,000 UgX].

Are you keeping up with the Kardashians? No, am keeping up with the Kagutas.

What did Daddy Andre tell Nina Roz? Tugende mu Church [Let us go to Church]! 

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy! No it makes him a very skilled worker.

Why did Italy win Euro 2020? Because it's coming to Rome.

How do the Lugbara greet? By mentioning the Ngoni tribe from Southern Africa and replying with UK (Muke).

If Express is the Oldest Football Club in Uganda, then which is the newest? New-press.

If GOD is the Father of JESUS and JESUS is GOD, then who is HIS grandfather? GOD the Grandfather.

Why didn't Eddy Kenzo play Adam and Eve with Rema? Because she gave the forbidden fruit to another man.

What's worse: Being broke or having HIV? Having HIV while broke.

Why do leopards have too many spots? Because of chicken pox got from eating stolen chicken.

Noah built the ark but who built the Ark of the covenant? Noah's descendant.

What's lion pupu used for? To make lion soap.

Imagine Arua was a drink, what would it be? Arua juice.

If men go to Mengo, then where do boys go? Wobulenzi.

Where do girls go? Kawaala.

Your friend is boring! No, you're the one who does not understand his entertainment.

Why did you join MTN? Because it uses the NRM colour.

Where do loners go to ride in a bus? Barcelona.

What do you call the wife of your neighbour? Neighbour-in-law.

Which animal would win Miss Curvy pageant? The hippopotam-ass.

Who killed Captain Alex? Wakaliwood.

What hairstyle did Navio tell the barber to fashion on his head? A clear cut.

If JESUS fed 5,000 men with only five loaves and two fish, then how come the disciples collected 12 baskets of leftovers just like HE fed 4,000 men with seven loaves and seven baskets of leftovers were collected? It's called additional mathematics.

Which professionals should not enter heaven first? Soldiers, prostitutes and tax collectors.

Can money buy love? It depends on how much love costs.

Why did Delilah betray Samson? Because he had more hair than her.

Is that black babe from Tennessee? Yes, she is the only 10 (ten) I see.

Who is the only man who can drink a bucket full of porridge? Moses Golola of Uganda.

What do sengas really do? They teach women how to pee and men how to make women pee.

Where does the wood used to make a court door in UG come from? Kotido.

Why are universities called "places for higher education"? Because scholars smoke weed.

Name an American actress who is not a fruit! Halle Berry.

Which Ugandan town is alcoholic? Kasese.

Do you believe in women's rights? Yes of course and lefts too.

Can banknotes buy true love? No, but they can buy a wedding ceremony and divorce papers.

Why is JESUS taking long to come back? Because He was crucified the last time.